I turn around and start running away because that’s the only thing I can think to do at the moment. Every stare, every whisper, every laugh slices at me. But the worst of it is that it was Grant who betrayed me. I can’t believe I thought he was the one. How stupid could I have been?
But you didn’t do anything wrong. He’s the bad one. He’s the one who betrayed your trust. Don’t blame yourself for his actions.My grandmother’s voice rings in my head. Even though I recognize the truth of it, the pain doesn’t lessen. And my shame only swells.
Part of me says I should give him a chance to explain. But I can’t imagine what his excuse would be.
Come on, girl. Sadie could’ve lied. She hates you, remember? Grant deserves ten minutes of your time.
Okay, fine. He does. I’ll talk with him after his class is over. I’m not optimistic, but I’m going to do the mature thing and listen to both sides.
I round the corner of the English department building. Behind it is the field that I cut across to reach my dorm. But I literally crash right into Heath, who comes running the other way. I manage to catch myself before falling.
“Watch where you’re going!” he says, wheezing. He starts to resume the run, but then looks more closely at me. “Wait. Aspen?”
I turn my face away, not wanting him to witness my humiliation.
“Jesus. What the fuck,” he mutters.
“Shut up and keep running,” I say, looking up at the sky because I amnotlooking at his dick.
“In a minute. Since we, like, literally just ran into each other, tell me something. Just what does Grant have that I don’t?”
My fragile resolve to speak to Grant cracks. I turn to face Heath, needing to see his expression and gauge how truthful he is. “So there really was a bet?”
“Well, yeah.” He looks at me like I’m stupid. “You think Will and I are doing this just for the hell of it?”
So everything Sadie said is true. Heath is an asshole, but I don’t think he’s lying. He knows I can check with Grant, and there’d be an ass kicking over a lie this egregious.
I start walking through the field.
“You didn’t answer my question!” Heath shouts. “What’s he got that I don’t?”
Ignoring him, I pick up speed. More tears fall, and I sniffle. I can’t believe Grant did this to me. I can’t believe everything’s been a lie. My first time—which I thought was so special—now feelsdirty.Ifeel dirty.
My phone rings. I fumble it out with numb fingers. Is this Grant calling to gloat? He must’ve known I’d see the spectacle. Actually… He knows I have a class…
I shake my head. Who the hell cares what he knows or thinks? He might’ve found out that Dr. Mazen planned to cancel the class this week.
But the call’s actually from Grandpa. I take a couple of breaths, trying to calm my racing heart. I can’t sound upset over the phone. He’ll know, and I don’t want to worry him. Grant is something I’ll have to deal with later, once I figure out what I’m going to do.
After clearing my throat, I answer. “Hi, Grandpa.” There’s nothing for a moment. “Grandpa?”
“Aspen.” His voice cracks.
“What’s wrong?” My heart starts racing again, this time with dread. He’s never sounded like this before.
“It’s your grandmother.” Then he breaks down in sobs.
The rest of what he manages to say between shaking breaths leaves me reeling. Life just delivered a KO.
Chapter Twenty-Three
Grant
Aspen doesn’t answer my texts for the rest of the day. I stop by the library, but she isn’t at the information counter. The librarian tells me she doesn’t have a shift today. I go over to the café, but she isn’t there, either.
Is she okay?
I know she didn’t see Will and Heath streaking. She isn’t the type to skip class. But then again, she isn’t the type to miss work, either.
