He was wrong about that; if we were going to explore a relationship—and I truly hoped we were—he deserved to know about my history. If I wouldn’t open up about my past, I couldn’t hope for him to eventually trust me enough to share what caused his pain so I could help him heal.
The noise in the main area of DeSires was almost offensively loud after so much time spent in the private room. I didn’t see Mav and John, which was probably a good thing. I wasn’t sure how Danny would feel about being faced with them so soon after what we’d done. I waved to Colin to let him know Danny and I were taking off for the night. The staff at the club were close-knit and, even though Danny tried keeping his distance from everyone, I knew Colin would worry.
The Lodge wasn’t as busy since it was the middle of the week, but it seemed the entire crew was hanging out. I tried sneaking past them to no avail.
“Danny! I thought you’d left for the night,” Sam bounded up to him, deeply in Little space. Danny looked up to me and his eyes widened when Sam grabbed his hand. “Come and sit with us.”
“Oh, I don’t—” He looked like the rope in a game of tug of war, holding tightly onto my hand while Sam tried dragging him away. His eyes pleaded with me to take control.
I couldn’t deny him. If he was willing to give me this gift, I’d take it for the night and talk to him more about it later. “Do you want to play with the boys for a little while?”
He wasn’t Little, but feeling like he was a part of something, mattered to him more than he’d admit. He needed to realize there were people who cared about him and wanted him around when they weren’t working. And I had a feeling spending some time letting go of the stress of being an adult would help him immensely.
Danny chewed on his lip. His eyes darted toward the playroom and then back to me. Finally, he nodded almost imperceptibly. “Is that okay, Sir? I don’t want you to leave without me.”
“I won’t go anywhere,” I promised him. “I can go up to the bar and talk to Jack and Theron while you hang out with your friends.”
He stood a bit taller at the mention of friends and his eyes widened. My heart broke as I realized he’d never considered these boys to be anything more than coworkers. I gave him a gentle pat on the backside, smiling when he winced. His body had been thoroughly abused, and he’d carry a reminder of what I’d done to him no matter where he was. “Go play. I’ll come and get you in about half an hour, and we’ll get you home for bed.”
“Thank you, Sir.” He tugged his hand free from Sam’s grasp and threw his arms over my shoulders. He stood on his tiptoes and kissed my cheek. “This is the best night ever. I owe you big time.”
“You don’t owe me anything,” I insisted. Anticipating his needs and taking care of him wasn’t a favor, it was a privilege. I lowered my voice, giving him a bit more guidance without making Sam feel bad. “I know you’re not Little like the rest of the boys but let yourself have fun. I’m sure there’s something in there you can do.”
“I will. Thank you, again.” The boy needed to stop thanking me all the time. It was sweet, but it was also a sign of how mistreated he’d been in the past.
I tucked my hand into the back pocket of his jeans, drawing him into a possessive kiss. His lips parted, allowing me deeper inside. In front of everyone, I was staking my claim on this man who’d been adrift. Danny moaned, grinding against my thigh. I dug my fingers into the flesh of his ass, stilling him. Even if he was ready to go another round, this wasn’t the time, and it definitely wasn’t the place. I soaked up every little noise he made before breaking the kiss and pressing my forehead against his. “You’ve had enough for one night. Go and have fun for a bit.”
I watched as he disappeared into the playroom with Sam before heading to the bar. All eyes were on me, and the men’s expressions ranged from approval to cautious warning. Jack, in particular, didn’t seem excited to see that I’d made my intentions known. Rather than avoiding him, I sat directly in front of him. I motioned Corey over, ordering a beer to help me get through the coming inquisition.
“I didn’t expect to see you walk out of there with a boy on your arm,” Jack commented once Corey moved on to his next customers. I was grateful Jack had waited that long before confronting me. “You’re usually set on making expectations clear.”
“And I still am.” I took a long draw off my pint, then traced a line in the condensation on the side of the glass when I set it back down. “In case you haven’t noticed, I have a clear set of rules I play by. It’s been nearly two months since I’ve played one-on-one with a single boy. I typically prefer helping couples fulfill their fantasies.”
“So, things are different now?” Jack pressed his lips into a thin line. “I don’t mean to pry, but Danny is a good man. Something’s been haunting him recently and I don’t want him getting worse. He’s a damn hard worker, but he’s been starting to slip up a bit.”
Fuck. That wasn’t good. It wasn’t my place to make excuses for him, and I couldn’t tell Jack I’d make sure things would get better in the future. I also wasn’t about to anger Jack by admitting I was pretty sure I’d played a role in his recent issues. Jack was insanely protective of his employees, seeing them all as a big family. There were other companies that made similar claims, but Jack took his words seriously.
“I have no plans of hurting him, Jack. I hadn’t planned on approaching him, but things happened tonight that changed everything. The details aren’t anything you need to know, but as soon as I held him for the first time, I knew he was supposed to be in my arms. I’ll take care of him for as long as he’ll let me.”
“That’s all I need to know.” Jack nodded and shook my hand. His grip was tight, as if silently warning me that I’d better follow through on my promise to him.
After that, the tension eased, and the group of men easily accepted me into the fold. They discussed plans their boys had made for playdates while I worried about how I could help Danny fit in with them when that wasn’t our dynamic. Theron’s invitation to join them for a cookout at his house both eased my worries and ramped up my anxiety that we were moving too fast to be healthy. Before excusing myself to take Danny home, I exchanged phone numbers with Theron and told him I’d let him know if we’d be attending.
From the very start, I was going to honor Danny’s need to both be guided and feel like an equal partner.
6
Danny
Seeingrelationships blossom and get serious in a matter of days wasn’t unusual at DeSires. That made the glacial pace things were moving between Blake and me even more frustrating. He’d become a fixture, stopping by every night to check on me. At the end of each shift, he’d walk me home and sit with me until I fell asleep.
But that was all. My sheets smelled like him from the time spent holding me until he had to sneak out, but he hadn’t touched me otherwise. The hugs, kisses, and back rubs were wonderful, but I wanted more. I wasn’t used to the almost tentative pace.
With any luck, that would change after tonight. Blake was taking me out to dinner for our first official date. And he’d told me to pack a bagifI was open to the possibility of going home with him tonight. That was possibly the most ridiculous thing I’d heard in a long time. As much as I liked being near him wherever we were, a bed that was actually big enough for two grown men would be nice for a change.
Andhe’d warned me he was coming straight from work. That meant I’d finally get to see him looking sexy in his uniform. It wasn’t going to be easy for me to be patient and wait until after dinner to beg him to fuck me.
I checked the time on my phone as I ran around my apartment like a mad man, trying to make sure I hadn’t forgotten anything. Once my bag was beside the door, I quickly straightened up the place. There wasn’t a ton to be done since it was such a small apartment, but somehow the kitchen counter tended to catch all the clutter. I pulled the garbage can over and sorted everything into bills that needed my attention and trash.
