see guys hooking up with one another every night, but now it felt like everyone close to me was
coupling up, shining a spotlight on the terminally single guy.
It was still eerie to walk into the bar when it was completely silent. The light from behind the bar
reflected off the mirror, offering just enough light to help me maneuver my way through the building
without having to turn on the overhead lights. I grabbed a glass of Coke from the tap before sneaking
into the kitchen to make myself a sandwich. A free meal with every shift wasn’t something Ineeded,
as I made decent money and my expenses were minimal—thanks to living with four other guys—but I
wasn’t about to say no to it either.
Normally, I would hide out in my office to get some homework done before I had to start work,
but today, the thought of being confined within those four walls felt stifling. Instead, I did something
that would probably seem strange to a lot of people.
I went into the playroom. My happy place. I’d mostly steered clear of the area since opening night
because I hadn’t wanted to address what Theron had made me feel. Every time I even looked at the
room, I thought about how it felt when he’d place a hand over mine or how I’d been unable to resist
standing next to him when he’d asked. Those were dangerous thoughts because I didn’t want to set
myself up for another fall.
But now, with no one else in the building, I was able to see it through fresh eyes. I set my
backpack down next to the oversized bean bag where I knew I’d eventually wind up. As I walked
through the room, I picked up the toys and gear that I’d personally picked out for the space. The
playroom might have been meant for everyone, but I’d taken liberty when filling it, creating the
playroom ofmydreams. I pulled a super soft unicorn out of the pet net in the corner. I loved her so
much. She was squishy and soft, and when I’d picked her out, I’d imagined cuddling her when my
mythical Daddy put me down for nap time. But now, that imaginary Daddy had a face and a name. I
held her tight, fighting the urge to cry for what would never be.
“Hey, is everything okay?” William’s brow was furrowed as he crossed the room. He cupped my
cheek and I leaned into the touch, only to recoil instantly. He wasn’t my Daddy and never would be.
He was Corey’s Daddy now. It made me a horrible friend, and a desperate, pathetic loser, to want
William to hold me even though I knew he was with someone else.
I tripped over a chair in my haste to put some distance between us. William caught me, pulling me
into a tight hug. “Talk to me, Sam.”
