1
Zach
“I transferredmoney into your account this morning,” Dad told me as I hefted my suitcase into the trunk. He’d been following me out to the driveway and then back to my bedroom all morning as if he had to make sure I wasn’t stealing any priceless antiques as I prepared for my escape.
As if.Even if Dad treated the crap he collected with more care than he did his own family, it was just that: shit no one else wanted. But god forbid anything was out of place.
I couldn’t fucking wait to get out of here. One more year, then I could hopefully find a job and never look back. Ihatedthis fucking place.
“Thank you, sir.” I expressed my gratitude through gritted teeth. He’d done jack shit toearnmy respect, but that didn’t mean he wouldn’t threaten to yank my spending money back if I didn’t fall at his feet to thank him.
Miserable sonofabitch.
“That’s all you get for the semester,” he reminded me as I stomped up the rickety steps at the front of the house. “Don’t think you can drink your way to the bottom of the account and come crying to me for more.”
If you asked him, my grades were due to constant partying. And, because he wasn’t as tech-savvy as he thought, I’d even caught him tracking my phone like a stalker last year. I shut that shit down quick because I didn’t need someone watching my every fucking move. Unfortunately, he was positive his sudden inability to see my location meant I had something to hide.
“I’m sure what you put in there is plenty,” I assured him as I grabbed the last stack of totes. Luckily, I didn’t have much shit of my own, and the rest of the stuff I didn’t want disappearing into dad’s hoard was safely in Daniel’s mom’s shed. “And I’ll be looking for a job once I get to Annandale. You don’t have to worry about me.”
“I don’t want you spreading yourself thin.” Dad held open the front door in an uncharacteristic show of kindness before following me out to the car. It would have been nice if he’d done that a few loads ago or had bothered helping me carry any of my shit, but real help might have made me die from shock. “You’re barely passing your classes as it is. Can’t have you wasting time at a dead-end job. What I gave you is more than enough to get through if you’re smart with your money.”
“Yeah, you’re probably right.” He was dead fucking wrong, but I wasn’t going to argue with him about it. If I hadn’t mentioned looking for a job, he’d have never known. Once I pulled out of the driveway, I would be out of sight and out of mind. He wouldn’t think twice until fall break when he expected me to come home and help him get the store ready for the holidays. He’d hold on to that shit hole until the city claimed the building, and I’d have to hear all about how he was trying to build a legacy he could pass on to his son.
It wasn’t so much a legacy as it was a trash heap I’d eventually have to deal with. Linwood as a whole went overboard with the holidays, and Dad was all about shoving as much crap as he could get his hands on into every display casejust in casethings got busy. Every January, he’d neatly label and store all the boxes in a unit across town, never to be seen again.
With the last of my stuff in the car, Dad and I stood awkwardly in the driveway. Resentment welled in my gut as the seconds dragged on painfully. If I turned away too quickly, he’d accuse me of being in a hurry to get away from him. If I stayed, I’d continue berating myself for not being the son he’d hoped to have.
Nothing in his life had gone the way he thought it would, and although he’d never outright blamed me, I knew. His bitterness was communicated in every glare and exasperated sigh. His disappointment was evident when he pinched the bridge of his nose as we argued over my plans for the future. He thought I was an idiot because I wouldn’t tell him what I wanted to do after school, and my stomach soured every time I imagined how he’d react if he knew the real me.
But, at the end of the day, he was still my dad, and he’d always done the best he could for me.
Dad scrubbed the back of his neck and kicked the compacted gravel. He cleared his throat, never looking up at me. “So, uh, you’d better get on the road.”
“Yeah, probably.” All summer, I’d been counting down the days and then hours until I could get back to Annandale, but now that it was time to go, I couldn’t get my feet to move. I studied him for a few seconds, truly seeing how he’d aged. The dark bags under his eyes were nothing new, but they seemed darker and puffier today. He might rebuff me, but I stepped closer, gripping his shoulder. “Try to get some downtime. You’re all I’ve got.”
As expected, he shrugged away, my arm falling to my side. “Don’t you worry about me. You worry about yourself. And I know you’re all about the college experience, but don’t forget you’ll get nowhere in life if you’re partying so much you fail your classes.”
And there it was.Fuck. He’d gotten so damn close to a goodbye that would leave me questioning whether I was a colossal dick, just to go and show how he really felt. I doubted it would matter if I was pulling straight A’s like some of my suitemates; Dad would still assume I was getting blackout drunk every night of the week.
I sucked in a sharp breath and held it, so I couldn’t say something I’d regret, as I turned and stalked toward my car. I got one foot inside when he added a final parting shot. “You know, if you’re spending so much time socializing, the least you could do is bring home a decent girl.”
“I don’t have time for that with all the studying I have to do,” I shot back. Besides, at this point, I was pretty sure there was something wrong with me on that front, too. I’d done my best to fuck my way through campus last year, trying to find a woman who could get me off without inappropriate thoughts filling my head.
Then, I’d really gone and screwed shit up when I agreed to a bit of fun time sharing with Daniel. He was my best friend at school, the only person who knew any of the real me, so it seemed like a good idea at the time.
That decision would go down as one of my biggest regrets. Things had gone well the first few times we took a girl back to our room. We set the rules ahead of time: both of us were there to make her feel good, and we weren’t going to touch each other. But then the lines blurred. I caught myself sneaking glances at the lines of his muscular thighs. I even bent down to lick his sweat from the girl’s skin, hoping she thought I was trying to make a move on her.
And then, the night I wished like hell I could erase from my memory happened. Daniel slipped his hand between my body and the girl I was trying to work up the ambition to fuck, curling his hand around my dick. It was like he knew I needed a little something extra to help me get the job done. But I could never take what he offered, so I did what I do best—I freaked the fuck out on him, and things were weird the rest of the semester.
Being away from him the past few months had been torture. When I closed my eyes at night, my mind put me on my hands and knees with him pounding into me. I was the one he was making scream. I was the one begging him for more.
This summer was supposed to get me over him, and now I was about to pop wood in my dad’s driveway.
“I’ll text you when I get settled in tonight,” I told Dad as I turned the key in the ignition. I wouldn’t bother calling because he’d ignore the incoming call and conveniently forget to call me back.
Sometimes, I thought his life was more manageable with me going to school five hours away.
The rest of the guys probably had their parents standing on the front porch, waving until they were out of sight. But that wasn’t how we rolled in this family. By the time I backed out of the driveway and glanced out the driver’s side window, Dad had disappeared into the house. He was probably trying to scrub away any evidence I’d been there at all.
