Corey let out another sigh, this time his entire body seeming to relax. “I guess I don’t understand
any of it.”
“Do you regret anything about last night? Is there anything we did that made you feel
uncomfortable?” I held my breath as I waited for his answer. Those crossed lines flashed in my mind.
I had no one to be pissed off with but myself if he said yes.
“No, and that’s part of what has me so confused,” he admitted.
“There’s nothing wrong with whatever turns you on, Corey.”
“I know that, logically, but how can I have these two completely opposing sides? It feels like
there’s a light and a dark side.”
I didn’t hold back my amusement. That seemed to be a good way to explain the precious boy next
to me. Still, I wanted him to talk through his confusion rather than simply supply him with I what I
thought were the answers. “How so?”
“I'm still not comfortable with it but I really like being… You know.” He squirmed, as if merely
thinking about being a little made him anxious. Understandable, given the bits he’d shared with me in
the past, but he had to stop thinking of himself as a little having jack shit to do with the rest of the
world.
“I’m afraid I don’t,” I lied. I knew damn well that he was still struggling with how easily he sunk
into little space but, again, he needed to be the one to address the elephant in the room.
“When we were at work last night,” he supplied as if that was all the explanation that would be
required. “When you asked me to be your little for the night, I was scared but I knew it would be
okay. I knew you wouldn’t let anything happen to me. I felt silly in the clothes you gave me, but I also
felt lucky, like you had given me the best Christmas present. Playing with toys was fun. Having you
bring me a juice box and snacks when I was coloring with Teo felt good. It was like I was really your
boy and you would do anything to take care of me.”
“That’s because you are my boy, sweetheart,” I reminded him. “Whether just for last night or this
month or the rest of our lives, for as long as we're together, you will always be my boy.”
“It’s going to take me some time to get used to,” Corey warned me, as if that hadn’t been obvious.
“I like it, even though my brain still tells me that it’s wrong and I shouldn’t.”
“Your brain lies to you,” I pointed out. “When you’re little, do you still hear those same self-
criticisms?”
