Dax
Justin was leaning against the wall in the cafeteria when I ushered my kids into the room. Once they were settled, we’d retire to the teacher’s lounge for a few minutes of much needed quiet, but everyone seemed to be hovering until they knew their class wasn’t going to be the unruly bunch. When he noticed me, he offered a curt nod.
Rather than cow away from his glare, I headed directly for him as soon as my kids were settled. “Did I do something to piss you off?” I asked. We were far too old for bullshit games, and I was wise enough to the workings of a small town to know better than to make enemies so soon after arriving.
“Why would you think that?” he asked. He straightened, as if trying to come across bigger and more imposing.
“Maybe it’s just me being insecure about trying to find my place in the pecking order, but you looked about ready to grab a fork off the nearest tray and stab me a minute ago,” I deadpanned. Maybe I wasn’t as good at making friends as I’d started to think. He was probably going to think I was a raging asshole if I didn’t reel it in soon.
“No man, we’re cool. I’m sorry if I gave you the wrong impression. Really, I didn’t mean to.” Justin seemed almost sheepish now. Just once, it’d be nice if my first impression of anything in this town would be accurate. He seemed genuinely upset that I thought he didn’t like me. And were we back in high school? Who even thinks about that shit other than fourteen-year-old girls?
“I’ll take your word for it,” I said lamely. “And I’m sorry, you probably weren’t doing anything. It’s tough being new in town, starting a new job, not knowing many people.”
“I get it. If you want, why don’t you head down to Rex’s with us tonight?” he offered. It was an olive branch. I couldn’t turn that down, but I’d finally convinced myself that it was time to tuck my tail between my legs and go down to Michael’s. I’d been making excuses for the past week every time he asked me to spend time with them. I had this irrational fear that he’d realize how I felt about him now that he knew I was gay, and I wasn’t willing to risk that. Seeing as tonight was his last night off this week, it was either tonight or wait another week.
Justin misunderstood my hesitation. “If you don’t want to, that’s cool. I just figured it’d give you a chance to meet some of the teachers outside the school. When we’re here, we all have to be on our best behavior, but it’s really a fun bunch.”
“No, it’s not that,” I assured him quickly. He motioned toward the exit and I followed him down to the teacher’s lounge. Probably a good idea since talking about going to the bar wasn’t the type of thing you should discuss around the kids. “I just had something I was going to do tonight. But it’s cool. Yeah, count me in.”
I couldn’t imagine we’d be closing down the bar, so I could always stop by Michael’s house after. Or maybe he’d meet up with us if his parents could watch Jagger. You know, as friends. Because it wouldn’t be awkward at all thinking about how much I’d rather be at home with my tongue, or other things, crammed down his throat, all while knowing that I couldn’t get too close to him.
Maybe Justin was right. I needed to get out of the house, away from Michael’s, and meet other people. This town was going to be my home, and I wasn’t doing myself any favors by putting everything into my relationship with Michael and Jagger.
“Cool.”
We settled down at the long table and all talk of unwinding with cocktails fell away. When it was time to go wrangle the kids and get them settled in for the afternoon, I kicked myself because I’d totally forgotten to call Michael to see if he’d come with us. It was a bad idea, but I’d rather have to deal with the awkwardness of seeing him in public than not see him at all.
When I opened the door to the room at the end of the day, I couldn’t help but smile at the sight of Michael waiting for Jagger. He looked as nervous as I felt as he picked at his fingernails. I wished, more than anything, that we could get back to the easy friendship we’d had before the start of the school year.
“Hey, go on in and I’ll be right back,” I told him while the kids were getting their backpacks. Having the door at the end of the hall had its advantages, namely the fact that I didn’t have to walk far to get the kids to the bus line. It also meant I didn’t have a member of the support staff staying in the room to monitor the kids who were waiting for their parents to pick them up. If anyone questioned why Michael was lingering around the room, I’d tell them he was a helpful room parent.
Jagger was busy showing Michael how much he’d learned today. It wasn’t much since the first month of the year was spent trying to make sure all the kids knew the basics like their letters, numbers, colors, and shapes. Still, I leaned against the door and watched the two of them as Jagger animatedly ran through one of the decks of flashcards he’d retrieved from a bin. It was hard to believe this was the same pairing I’d had to practically push together a few weeks ago. It made me think I’d done something right, no matter what happened in the future.
“Oh, Mr. Collins, you’re back!” Jagger exclaimed. “I was just showing Daddy that I know all my shapes and colors now. I used to get mixed up sometimes, but not now. Isn’t that awesome?”
I joined them at the low table, groaning when my aching hip popped as I tried to sit in one of the Hobbit-sized chairs. Michael jumped out of his seat and had his hand on my elbow before I could protest. I wanted to be pissed that he felt the need to rescue me, but the truth was the way my hip locked up, it was very likely I did need his help.
I was beginning to think I’d underestimated how physical of a career I’d entered, but I wasn’t going to let the pain deter me. I’d use it as a reminder of where I’d come from. And I was even more convinced now that there was a reason for it all. That was the only remotely logical explanation for the fact that I wound up being offered a job in the same town where my life had ended and been revived. It was all symbolic voodoo shit that I would have discredited years ago, but as coincidences added up, I had to believe there may be something to it. So, I offered Michael a wan smile and allowed him to lead me over to a seat with more human proportions.
“You okay?” he asked quietly, keeping one eye on Jagger to make sure he wasn’t distressed.
“I’m fine,” I grumbled. The truth was, my embarrassment overrode the pain. I didn’t like showing weakness, and my lasting injuries were big damn faults in my makeup. Then again, given the direction things seemed to be heading, maybe it was for the best that Michael know what he was getting himself into. Winter was going to be the real bitch, when every step became agony and I didn’t want to get out of bed half the time.
Before Michael could ask any more about my accident, which he did every time I started acting more like an eighty-year-old than my twenty-six years, Justin cleared his throat behind us. I was equally grateful to him for saving me from having to once again tell Michael I wasn’t ready to talk, and pissed at him for popping by unannounced before I had a chance to tell Michael about the change of plans for the evening.
“Oh, sorry. I didn’t realize you were busy,” he said when he realized I wasn’t alone. “I was just going to let you know we’re all meeting up at Rex’s at six-thirty. That’ll give everyone time to do whatever they have to do and change into something less buttoned up.”
Didn’t really seem like the way you’d do after-work drinks, but what did I know? I was the new kid lucky enough to be invited along. I glanced at Michael and saw him standing as straight and still as a toy soldier. Fuck, Justin really needed to work on his timing.
“Yeah, that sounds good.”
Once we were alone again, Michael couldn’t seem to get away from me fast enough. I’d royally screwed up by not calling him at lunch and I knew it. “Hey, I’m sorry about that. I finally confronted him today and asked him why he was being such a dick. I think this is his way of proving I’m a colossal head case and that he’s the world’s greatest coworker for taking the new guy under his wing.”
“Yeah, he’s like that,” Michael responded with a thick layer of sarcasm. “A real stand-up guy. He’d give you the shirt off his back if you were cold.”
“Is there bad blood between the two of you or something?” I needed to know. It’d make it more difficult to maintain two different sets of friends, but we were all adults. It could be done.
“No, not at all.” There was no delay in his response and he looked me square in the eye, so I knew he was telling the truth. “It’s a long, complicated story. I wouldn’t blame him if he did hate me, but I don’t think he has it in him to hate anyone. He really is a great guy.”
