“Nah, not quite this bad, but they knew what you needed. They’re good that way.” We stop beneath a street light and Tony cups my face in his hands. The kiss is sweet and filled with promise of amazing things to come in the future. The moment terrifies me more than I’ll ever admit.
* * *
Tony
Everything was going wellfor much of the day. After I got over the shock of my family’s reaction to my “news” it was actually an enjoyable day. The Rossi family didn’t treat me like an outsider or a burden. Ironically, my own parents have become masters at treating me as if I don’t belong over the years. Then, Dom suggested that we walk at least part of the way home and my heart melted. Holding one another tightly as the snow fell around us was magical. But then, I felt Dom starting to pull away from me.
“Are you okay?” I ask as I put on a pot of coffee. I’m exhausted, but I’m also feeling the cold all the way to my bones and I need to warm up before heading to bed.
Dom sneaks up behind me as I pull two mugs out of the cupboard, wrapping his arms around my waist. I lean back into his embrace, resting my head on his shoulder. “Why wouldn’t I be?” he asks, as if mine was the most ridiculous question he’s heard all day.
I turn around in his arms so I’m leaning against the counter, staring into his deep brown eyes. His dilated pupils show me that he’s already thinking about what he’d like to have happen next, leaving me to believe that I’m making something out of nothing.
“Today was pretty intense. I guess I just need to know that you’re okay with everything. You know, that you’re okay with us still trying to see where things go,” I ramble, averting my eyes because this is all a bit too intense for me.
Dom crooks one finger beneath my chin, forcing me to look at him. “I’m good, Tony,” Dom swears to me. “I’ll admit that I was upset for a while, but that’s my issue, not yours. Andrew put me in my place, up to and including calling me a conceited asshole for thinking you were coming out for me. Once he put things into perspective, I understood. I’m just sorry your parents reacted the way they did.”
Dom’s fingers tighten around the back of my neck, pulling me to him until our mouths connect. His tongue teases along the seam of my lips until I finally relent and allow him inside. From there, he deepens the kiss, claiming every corner of my mouth as his own.
I moan into his mouth when Dom’s other hand squeezes my ass. If we keep going at this rate, we’ll be naked on the kitchen floor within the next two minutes. That would be a great way to end one of the most emotional Christmases I’ve ever had, but I need something different tonight.
My hands move to Dom’s shoulders and I gently push him away. “Would it be okay if we chill on the couch for a bit?” I ask, trying to ignore the pain of rejection in his eyes.
“Yeah. Sure.” Dom steps back when I reach for him. This is the type of shit I’d be better at if I hadn’t been trying to hide for fourteen years.
With my hands placed on the counter, I stand there for a few minutes wondering if I’ll ever get better at not saying shit that pushes Dom away from me. I fill both mugs with coffee and turn out the light on my way to the living room. I’m halfway expecting Dom to have retreated to the bedroom, but he’s crouched in front of the gas fireplace, holding his hands close to the flame.
He’s muttering something I can’t understand, but I don’t think I’m meant to. I set down the coffee as quietly as possible and sneak down the hall to the bedroom to get more comfortable.
When I return to the living room, Dom hasn’t moved a muscle. I lean against the doorway watching as he continues talking to the flames. “There will probably always be a part of me that loves you, Brandon. You were the first man I ever loved, but it’s time for me to be happy. I think I have that, and if there’s any truth to what my grandma used to tell me, I’d like to believe that you had a hand in sending him to me.”
I clamp a hand over my mouth, hoping Dom didn’t hear the gasp escape my lips. This moment feels intimate and private and I’m the voyeur watching. Part of me wants to turn and hide in the bedroom for as long as he needs, but my heart sends a signal to my feet to move. I quietly sit on the floor behind Dom, pulling him so he’s sitting between my legs. He’s closing a door to one chapter in his life and I’m the lucky bastard who’ll hopefully help him write all the rest.
I’ve spent much of the day second-guessing my decision to ask Dom to move to Virginia. Although I gave him a long speech about how it doesn’t need to mean anything other than fulfilling a need for both of us, I doubt either of us will be satisfied with a roommates arrangement. It feels as if we’ve been running at warp speed since the moment our paths crossed and I’m worried that the attraction will begin to wane once we don’t have distractions like weddings, holidays, and mental breakdowns to keep us from facing the real issues any new couple has to tackle.
The last thing I want is Dom to feel like this is something he has to do to make me happy. He could just as easily stay here in the city and live with Andrew and Cara. It was unfair of me to ask in the heat of the moment the way I did.
“My butt’s going numb,” Dom grumbles, rolling himself over to push off the floor. I laugh because I’ve been thinking the same thing for a while but didn’t want to do anything to break the moment we seemed to be sharing.
Dom reaches for my hand, pulling me up so we’re chest to chest. His fingers interlace with mine as he leads me to the couch. I take a seat at one end and Dom sprawls along the length of the couch with his head on my lap. “Were you serious about me moving down to Virginia?” Dom asks as I run my fingers through his hair.
I stiffen for a moment, feeling exposed. There’s no question that I was being sincere in my offer, my only concern is that it was ill-timed and a stupid thing to do. No matter how good the sex is, it’s still out of character to ask a man to move in. Some of my buddies have gone years, even losing women they claimed to love because they wouldn’t ask her to co-habitate.
“Yeah, of course,” I respond, trying to hide the tremor in my voice. The fact that he brought it up has me even more nervous. “But I don’t want you to feel pressured. I just thought it’d be a win-win for both of us. You’re looking for a change, I’m looking for someone to split the bills with and it’d be easier to see you whenever I want if you’re not all the way across the country.”
Dom’s body shakes as he starts laughing uncontrollably. It’s a complete turnaround from how subdued he’s been since we got home that it throws me for a loop. “What’s so funny?” I ask.
“You,” he cackles. “You make this grand gesture, inviting me to move to be close to you. Then, you sit and hold me while I have a mini-meltdown and I fall in love with you a little bit.”
“Okay,” I say, drawing the word out into at least three syllables. So far, I’m failing to see the issue.
Dom reaches up to run his fingers along my jaw. He stills them once a single finger is resting across my lips. “What made me laugh is that you almost screwed it up right at the end. Seriously, do you always woo men by telling them it’ll be good to have someone to split the bills with?”
My head falls to the back of the couch. “Fuck, that probably did sound pretty bad, huh?” I ask sheepishly. “In my defense, I did warn you that I have zero frame of reference when it comes to relationships. Hopefully, you’ll grade me on a curve and let me make it up to you. And what in the hell is ‘wooing’ anyway? Sounds like some stupid word a chick made up.”
Dom turns away from me, staring out at the Christmas tree long enough that I begin to squirm. “Oh, come on,” I prod, needing this torture to end. “It sounded bad, but would you have rather I told you that I’m falling madly in love with you even though I keep telling myself that I don’t even know you yet?”
“Well, yeah,” Dom responds. He rolls onto his other side so he’s facing me. He kisses my belly button as his hands travel up to my neck. “But a word of advice…”
