“They’re coming, Rachel,” Luis called out, grumbling about how it’d be easier to get the food out if he knew we needed it.
“Mama, can you go out to the main dining room and check on our guests,” I suggested. If the kitchen was in the weeds, we’d likely need her personality to smooth over any upset customers. “Let everyone know we’re working to get the food out as quickly as we can. Do your Italian Mama thing.”
“Don’t think I don’t know what you’re doing,” she warned me, tossing a rag onto the prep table. “But I’ll do it, because I know you won’t accept my help back here.”
“Mama, it’s not that,” I assured her. “We have a routine back here and the guys are already thrown off because Carlos is out tonight. It’s not you. Really. Once you make sure no one’s ready to walk out, I could use you at the expediting window.”
When Mama came back to the kitchen after a round through the dining room, she seemed much more relaxed and grabbed tickets to start putting together the orders entrées. It only took a few minutes before we had all the outstanding orders on their way out to the tables.
“Freddie, we have everything handled in here again and there are no new tables coming out.” Mama walked around the line and picked up a wet rag. “You go out there and spend time with your family. If I need help again, I’ll ask Frankie to come and help me.”
At least this time Mama wasn’t trying to make it seem like she could do everything on her own. I once again took off my apron and threw it into the dirty laundry hamper. I went to Mama and gave her a quick hug, thanking her for giving me the rest of the night off. Maybe Peter was right and we needed to find a way to keep Mama involved in the restaurant.
I’d been annoyed about missing dinner with Peter and Sophia, but I couldn’t stay mad when I entered the dining room and found Sophia curled up on Peter’s lap, watching a movie while Peter stroked her hair. Both of them looked minutes away from falling asleep.
“Hey you two,” I whispered. I’d gotten hung up long enough the back dining room was deserted; Tony had even finished resetting the room for lunch. “How about if we head home?”
Peter met my gaze and smiled. When he reached out to me, I didn’t hesitate to take his hand. “You’re pretty good at this parenting thing.”
Once the words were out, they couldn’t be taken back. I’d been very careful about putting any sort of label to what was going on between Peter and me, but seeing him gently rocking Sophia to sleep after their date night made me want something I’d avoided going for; a life with him in it.
“It’s not so bad,” Peter quipped. He didn’t seem upset by my slip, so I decided it’d be for the best to let it go. “I basically think about what I’d like and that’s what I do for her.”
“You’re not a child,” I pointed out.
“Nope, but I’ve been told enough times that I act like one.” Sophia burrowed closer to his chest when he tried handing her off to me. I watched as he stood, more graceful in heels than I could’ve been barefoot, and draped his lightweight jacket over her back. “If I ever settle down and have kids, I hope they’d wind up as easy to deal with as Sophia.”
“Are we talking about the same child?” I asked, remembering back to this morning when she’d melted down because I wouldn’t let her bake muffins with Peter before her playdate.
“Man, she’s just a kid. Everything’s bigger when you’re small.” I wasn’t sure if that was sage wisdom he’d come up with on his own or a load of bullshit he’d pulled out of a fortune cookie.
As we said goodbye to my brothers and the rest of the staff, I tried not to think about Peter’s comment about if he ever settled down. Even before they came in for dinner tonight, I was hoping there might be a chance for something more with him; I wanted him to see he had a life and people who loved him here so he didn’t rush back to New York.
I watched as Peter opened the back door, bent down, and gracefully settled a sleepy Sophia into her car seat. She complained when he tried moving her to buckle her in, but he calmed her quickly by telling her it was time to go home and promising we’d watch whatever movie she wanted once we got there.
“Do we have popcorn and snacks for the movie?” Peter asked as I pulled into the lane of traffic.
“You do realize we're not actually getting through more than fifteen minutes of the movie before she passes out, right?” Once Sophia was asleep and we managed to put her into her bed, I had every intention of dragging Peter up to what I’d come to think of asourbedroom to see what he had on with those heeled boots.
Sometimes, I worried what it meant that I was so turned on by Peter wearing women’s lingerie. I didn’t want him thinking the only reason I was attracted to him was because he had an affinity for sexy underthings, but there was no denying it was the quickest way for my mind to turn to sex.
“I know, but I wasn’t sure if you were hoping to keep up the pretense that we were going to have a night where both of us managed to keep our clothes on,” Peter quipped.
There was something in his tone that gave me pause, and I began to worry that I was the one trying to make sure what was happening between us stayed sexual. It should have been easier for me to explore my sexuality with somebody that I’d known most of my life, but there were times I placed Peter into two distinct boxes: the one where he was my childhood best friend, and the other where he was the first man I trusted myself enough to give my body to.
“Can I ask you a question?” I tapped at the steering wheel, concerned I was about to ruin everything, but I needed to know the answer.
“Yeah, sure.”
“Does it bother you that most nights I’m so tired by the time I get home that all I want to do is go to sleep?”
“Oh honey, if going to sleep was what you wanted to do when you got home that might be an issue,” Peter teased, reaching over to place a hand on my knee. “If what you’re really asking is if I have an issue with the fact that most of the time you get home and want to get me in bed as quick as possible, then I’m not sure how that’s a problem.”
“But does it upset you that you spend most of your time picking up after Sophia and me, and when I’m home the quality time we spend together is usually in the bedroom?” Now that I’d said it out loud it seemed silly, but I didn’t know what type of relationships Peter was used to back in New York.
“Freddie, how many times do I have to tell you to quit over-thinking things?” He slid his hand up my thigh until his fingers grazed the edge of my dick. “The time I get to spend with you has made everything a little easier. Yes, it sucked that the reason I came home is that my mama died, and I hate knowing that Maria’s been hurting because she didn’t have anyone she could relate to in that house, but knowing you’ll be coming home at the end of every day takes a bit of the sting out of why I am here.”
“But do you wish that there was more between us?” I slowed to a stop at the red light and placed my hand over Peter’s on my leg. “I guess what I’m trying to say is I’m not as certain as I was when we started this that I’m cut out for casual sex. I know what we’re doing doesn’t necessarily constitute casual, but if it was up to you, would you want a real relationship with me?”
