“Ready to go home?” he mumbles against the top of my head as he wraps me up in a strong embrace.
A warm glow fills me at the thought, and I hug Curio even tighter as my gaze finds Tarek and Riall. “Home sounds perfect.”
ChapterFifty-Nine
Stunned, I read the note again in disbelief.
Auset,
It’s high time you had a room of your own. We made some adjustments to the furniture that was ordered for you. We hope you like it. Welcome to the family, Little Scorpion.
Love,
Eacon and Rink
I look up from the parchment and stare open-mouthed at the most beautiful room I’ve ever seen. A gargantuan four-poster bed takes up most of the space, and it’s easily big enough to fit me and the Scorpions and probably half of a village. Gauzy delicate fabric curtains hang on each side of the bed, and I can picture how cozy it will be to close ourselves off from the world and get lost in the sheets and each other whenever we want.
A gorgeous giant star chart is hung on one wall, with a pretty vanity set beneath it. I skim my fingertips delicately over the combs and brushes that have been laid out for me. A wardrobe takes up the entirety of the opposite wall. When I open it, I find a place for my togs and rinds, but I squeal with excitement when I see that there’s also a section for my armor and racks for my weapons.
A large hearth is nestled between two towering windows that look out on rocky cliffs and crashing waves. A couple of oversized chairs sit in front of the hearth, and I laugh when I realize they’re the same style and color as the one Riall and I broke in his room. Thick colorful rugs overlap on the floor, and all my favorite colors of the sunset are splashed here and there across the stunning room. It’s feminine and practical, warm and cozy. It’s perfect in every possible way, and it’s all mine.
I swallow the lump in my throat and blink away the stinging emotion in my eyes. After everything that’s happened and everything I’ve learned over the past two months that we’ve been away, I didn’t realize how badly I neededthisuntil now. The room grows blurry as my eyes fill with tears. I don’t know if I’m overwhelmed by the loving generosity or finally in a place where it’s safe for me to break under the weight of everything I’ve been carrying, but it comes pouring out of me, and there’s not a thing I can do to stop it.
I give in to the overwhelming feelings of grief and sorrow as strong arms wrap around me. I’m set in a lap as hands rub down my back, my hair, my arms. Soothing words are whispered to me as I finally let go of the pain and the hurt so that the love and support can begin to trickle in. I don’t know how long I break for or how long it takes for the tears to stop and the cracks to slowly fill and harden.
Gentle hands begin to strip me out of my cloak and togs and undergarments. I’m lifted and carried into a gorgeous bathing chamber that’s bright and beautiful. A tub, somehow bigger than the colossal one in Riall’s washroom, is already filled with steaming water and two of my mates. Bubbles envelop me as I’m set carefully in the water. I look up at Tarek’s gorgeous face, his ice-blue eyes filled with warmth and adoration as he begins to strip out of his clothes.
“A girl could get used to this,” I tell them, my voice rough from all of the emotion that spilled out.
“A girlshouldget used to this,” Tarek insists, and three fiendish grins are aimed my way as I move to the middle of the tub.
I watch hungrily as Tarek slips into the water with us, his delicious cock dipping beneath the steam and bubbles as Riall tilts my head back and starts to wet my hair. It’s beyond easy to relax into their administrations. Curio begins to wash my hair, and Tarek soaps up a cloth and slowly rubs it over every inch of my body. They touch and stroke until the last dregs of my distress and desolation disappear. The remaining holes in my soul are filled, and the broken parts of me that I thought would be forever shattered fuse together using all the love and acceptance they endlessly pour into me.
“Is it over?” I ask weakly.
“What?” Riall queries. “Our taking care of you? Or all the horrible shit you just went through?”
I snort out a laugh that sounds empty and sad. “The horrible shit,” I answer.
“Asoveras anything that fucked up can be,” Curio assures. He cups my face, his thumb rubbing comforting swipes across my cheek as I lean into his touch.
“I wish I could kill her every day for the rest of my life. It still wouldn’t be enough, but maybe I could feel better about all of this somehow. She broke too fast.”
I think about Eacon saying the same thing about the fae from the ship who killed Yaren. I should talk to her; she’d probably have some good advice about all of this.
“We can’t bring her back for you, but we can find an endless number of deserving fae for you to kill every day if that helps,” Tarek offers.
I look at him, expecting a cheeky twinkle in his eye, but I quickly realize that he’s completely serious. His earnest offer warms me in all the places that feel cold and barren right now. I reach my hand out to him, and he threads his fingers with mine. He lifts my knuckles to his lips, kissing each of them like they’re precious.
“It’s hard,” I admit, my voice cracking from the overpowering adoration I feel right now, and Riall pulls me into his lap and runs his big hand down my hair. “I think about how horrible and fucked up everything has been, how unfair it all was and what it’s done to me. Then I look at you three and realize that there would have been no path toyouif I hadn’t gone through that. I just wish the pain of it all didn’t still linger,” I admit as I consider each of them.
They’re so breathtakingly stunning and perfect for me in every way it’s hard to fathom that they’re mine, but they are.
“I don’t know if the hurting or the grief ever really stops or if we just get better at living with it. In the end, I did find you, I found this, and it’s more than I ever dared to hope for.”
I gesture to all of us as tears well in my eyes. I embrace the vulnerability of bearing my soul, because I know it’s safe with them, that it always will be no matter what.
“I’m just so fucking happy you found me. That you saw me, really sawme, and knew I needed you.”
