Do I still want that?
My thoughts and feelings are a chaotic jumble. When I asked Wekun to sever the bonds, I had no doubt that it was the best choice for everyone involved, but I can’t deny that things have changed. There’s no clarity in what I should or shouldn’t do right now. I’m not even sure if this other Bond Weaver will even be able to help, so really all of this could be a moot point.
I sigh.
I’m glad that things aren’t so awful with these three at the moment. They are making an effort, and I won’t turn a blind eye to that, but I don’t know what the future holds. I’m trying to accept a life here, but if I’m being honest, I was only doing that because I felt I had no choice otherwise. I know I can go home now, when all is said and done, and I can’t pretend that I don’t want that still. I don’t know what the right move is yet.
“I think all of us should be focusing on breaking the Vow and winning this war. We can figure the rest out later,” I tell him evasively.
Zeph’s eyes narrow slightly, but he doesn’t press for more or demand that I make a choice right then and there. He just studies me for a beat and then nods his head once.
“We have a lot to prepare for, and Falon’s right, training with these runes needs to be at the top of our priority list,” Ryn agrees.
I pretend like I don’t hear the despondency in his tone and that its presence doesn’t make my heart ache. I don’t want to piss on his ice cream, but I don’t know what to do. We’ve all shown our worst sides, and I can’t pretend that I haven’t seen them. What happens if things go back to that? What happens if…
I turn away from that niggling thought. I remember what my dad taught me about breaking the magic in a rune, and I know I can do that against the Vow. I won’t need to die.
“Okay, let’s go get our badass on,” I chirp, dismissing the foreboding feeling that just crept into my chest. I give a clap and then head for the tent exit again.
“Little sparrow,” Zeph calls out, his tone sensual and amused.
“Yeah?” I ask, a little breathier than I’d like.
“You’re still bare,” he points out, and I look down to see that, yep, I’m still naked.
“Right,” I snap-finger gun point at him, because that’s something normal people do.
Everyone’s mouths twitch like they’re all trying to hold back a smile.
“Who has a shirt I can borrow?” I ask sheepishly.
Treno plucks his from the end of his bed and tosses it to me. I catch it and pull it on, totally not sighing at the way it smells, because that would be fucking creepy.
“Alrighty then, I’ll just see you boys out on the training field later,” I announce, way too cheery, and then what do I do...I fucking salute them again.
I rush out the tent, ignoring the chuckles that erupt as I do, and stare up at the brightening sky for a moment while I sigh and face palm.
Smooth, Falon. Real fucking smooth.
18
“How about now?” I ask, sounding a little constipated, but I’m concentrating so hard there’s nothing I can really do about that.
“That’s it!” Wekun cheers like a proud parent.
I smile and hoot out my excitement. “Finally!” I screech and do a little dance that involves some twerking followed by aggressive hip thrusting. For three days now, I’ve been working on this sequence of runes on my back so I can make myself disappear, and this is the first time I’ve actually completely done it. I’ve made myself fade or blend, but they’ve still been able to spot the outline of me, but now...I’m fucking invisible.
I look over at the guys, but instead of finding their wandering eyes as they search to locate my perfectly non-existent ass, they’re all looking right at me. Ryn snickers a little, and I narrow a glare on Wekun.
“What the hell? You said I had it,” I accuse.
“Well, you did, and then you…didn’t,” he admits on a chuckle that he immediately tries to cover up.
I groan. “So that whole ‘dance like no one is watching’ thing…”
“Yeah, we were all watching,” he admits.
“I liked it,” Ryn offers with a smile.
