I push into the vault inside of me with a shout.“Pigeon, I’m sorry. Please come out!”
Lavender eagle eyes blink to life in the distant darkness, and relief washes through me. Pigeon’s features are barely discernible, cloaked in the shadows of the dark place I’ve exiled her to. She cringes against the light pouring in from the open vault door behind me, and I feel her rage and desolation surge.
“I’m sorry,”I offer again in defense of the hurt and rage I suddenly feel rippling off of her, but it’s not enough, my words feel inadequate to even me.
The nothingness of where I’ve banished her to wraps around me like cold chains. Mistrust, dishonor, fury, abandonment, all make up the texture of this place, and I wish all at once that I could yank these things from the fabric of Pigeon’s and my foundation and build on more loving and understanding solid ground.
Tears prick my eyes.“Pigeon, I—”My words and heartfelt sentiment are shoved back down my throat when she attacks out of nowhere. Quicker than a striking snake, she slams into me with brutal force. Shocked, I scream and fall back. I land on one hand as I try to catch my fall and throw the other palm out to try and protect myself.
The light in this place dims oddly, and I look up expecting Pigeon to be lording over me, like I did her when I shoved her in here. She’s not there. I search for her, ready to fling apologies until one hits its mark, but all I see is the light of the door into this vault growing smaller and smaller. By the time I realize what’s happened, it’s too late.
“Pigeon!”I scream, panicked, springing to my feet and running for her.
The light is only two feet wide now.
“Pigeon, don’t do this! Listen to me, we need each other!”I shout at her as I race to try to escape the brutal trap that I created for her.
“Please, I’m sorry!”I beg as the light reduces to a mere sliver.
“I need you,”I plead, but it’s too late. My words fall on deaf ears as I slam into the shut vault door where I’m forced to listen to Pigeon locking it from the other side.
“No!”I scream as I bang on the prison walls.“This isn’t going to fix anything!”I shout at her, but I don’t even know if she’s there listening anymore.
A cold darkness slithers around me, and I kick at the bleakness, refusing to accept that this is what Pigeon and I have been reduced to. We have to be more than just two warring sides, but how the fuck do we get across the canyon of distrust and pain now sitting between us?
“Pigeon!”I wail as my fists slam against the cool metal of the vault I’m now trapped in.“I love you, don’t do this!”I implore, but my cries are only met with deafening silence.
Out of nowhere, I’m hit with a fuck ton of sensations and pain all at the same time. It takes me a minute to collect my thoughts and understand what’s happening. I can feel my body ripping apart and reshaping, and yet I have no control over it. I’ve—we’vejust shifted.
Worry takes over my thoughts. What will she do? Will she freak out and try to escape, getting us all caught? Will the guys stop fighting long enough to calm her down? I can feel her rage pumping through our veins, and the last thing any of us needs to be dealing with right now is a psychotic, volatile gryphon.
I try to believe that seeing her mates all together will be enough to soothe her, but that will only stay that way if they all keep their mouths shut and put her before their issues.
Fuck, that’s never going to happen.
I pound on the walls of the vault and scream until my voice is hoarse. She doesn’t know what she’s walking into with her mates. She tried to rip Ryn apart the last time he pissed her off; will she do the same thing now?Can she, with our mate connection, I wonder and then realize she might not care what it does to us.
My voice quits altogether, and I can feel blood dripping off my knuckles from where I’m banging on my cell wall. Defeat filters through me, and I press my forehead to the cool wall and try to breathe through the shame and frustration I’m treading in.
“Fuck,” I whisper, lost against the cold barriers caging me in, and the word bounces back against my lips like this place wants me to choke on it.
I close my eyes and shake my head at myself. I should be pissed, but all I can think about is how long did Pigeon scream? How long before her voice gave out? How couldIhave done that to her?
I’m such an asshole.
Pushing away the guilt that’s thrashing inside of me, I try to focus on how the fuck I’m going to get myself out of this, because Ihaveto get out of this. I have no doubt that, with the way Pigeon is feeling right now, she’s going to lock me in here forever.
I can feel my body, so there’s that. Right now we’re pacing, and Pigeon feels agitated. I can’t tap into my other senses, but I’m not completely cut off. So what the fuck can I do with that?
I start feeling around the inside of the dark vault I’m trapped in with my hands, as though my desperation is going to conjure a key. Wait a second! I created this vault. I pictured what I wanted in my head and shoved Pigeon inside. I cringe as the memory of that plays out in my mind—or is this Pigeon’s mind right now?
Walk away from theInceptionspeak, Falon. That meta shit will get you nowhere.
Okay, focus. I made the vault. That means I can unmake it, or maybe just change it? I don’t want Pigeon to think I’m coming for her, I just need her to hear me. I snort incredulously as an image of a bird cage pops into my mind. The irony isn’t lost on me. I focus hard on changing the vault into a bird cage. I make it as much of an eyesore as possible so Pigeon still feels like I’m being adequately punished while I try to fix all that I’ve fucked up with her.
I recall this creepy old dude who used to walk his parrots around the park. He’d have their dented silver metal cage on a cart, and he’d stroll them around the playground like that. I think he thought he was doing a nice thing. It always bothered me that he never thought to just let them out of the cage to experience the fresh air. He didn’t trust them to do what he wanted outside of the cage, so he would never let them out. I hate that I’m doing the same thing.
Anytime Pigeon does something that I don’t like, I lock her up. I expect her to be there for me, but if I don’t agree with what she wants or says she needs, I shut her out and take back control. I’m no better than the creepy guy walking his caged birds around the park.
