Ryn’s fingers tracing up my side pull me from the memory, and I shiver, not able to help it. Ryn doesn’t notice, seemingly lost in his own thoughts. I watch as he debates something for a moment. His eyes go far away for a beat and then they focus on me again as he settles on a decision.
“I was sent here to find information on what Zeph and I think might be a secret weapon. I found it, and now we can destroy the Vow once and for all,” he tells me, like this solves everything.
“Wow,” I state in response, not sure what else to say.
Ryn must hear hesitation in my tone, because he sits back, like my lack of excitement just slapped him across the face. He pulls out of me, and just like I suspected, I feel the peace around us shatter. I sit up, and we both stare at each other for a moment.
“What am I missing here?” he finally asks, and I release a deep weary breath.
“I can’t go back, Ryn. I want you to be where you’re safe, so I understand that you have to go, but that’s not an option for me. I’m still trying to get home, and I think I may be able to figure out how...here.”
The line in my mother’s journal about my gran finding a way for them to be safe resonates in my mind. Gran was a gryphon, and yet she must have figured out that there was something going on with the gates. I’m hoping there’s a book or something in the archives that will help me figure them out. It may take ages to find it, but I sure as hell won’t find it with the Hidden. Especially not if Zeph kills me, like he promised to do.
Ryn’s eyes harden, and his nostrils flare with anger. I can tell he’s trying to control his breathing, but the fury is etched all over his face.
“Your place is here, Falon. This is home now,” he declares, slapping his palm against his chest. He angrily gestures in the direction of Kestrel City. “You can’t stay here. It’s not safe, and I can’t just leave you. That’s not in me.”
“Ryn...” I start. “Zeph—”
“This isn’t about Zeph!” Ryn snaps, cutting me off. “I know you two got off on the wrong foot, but he doesn’t trust easily. If you knew what he has been through—”
“I don’t fucking care what he’s been through,” I shout at Ryn, not meaning it, but pissed all the same.
I get up and move in the direction of my clothes. Ryn steps in my way.
“He put his hands around my throat and told me if he ever saw me again, he’d kill me. Thisisabout Zeph, and Ican’tgo back.”
Ryn opens his mouth to argue, but I shut it down.
“We fucked, it’s fine. You don’t owe me anything, and I don’t expect anything. I’m not some weepy girl who gets too attached because you stuck your dick in me. Maybe I’m not safe here, but I wasn’t safe with the Hidden either. I wish you all the best with this war. I just hope I can get as far away from it as possible,” I tell him, and then I try to step around him.
He blocks my path again.
“Falon, you are coming with me. That’s the end of it. You can trust me to protect you.”
Ryn’s words and tone are harsh. They lash out at me like a whip that not only wants to sting me with each crack but bind me so I can’t escape. Pigeon rustles uneasily inside of me as if she’s uncomfortable watching her friends fight and doesn’t know what to do about it.
I huff out a resigned breath, and my eyes soften. I step into Ryn like a good little gryphon that’s submitting. He relaxes slightly and brings his hands up to rub my shoulders comfortingly. Before he can touch me, I bring my knee up hard against his unprotected and uncovered balls.
Ryn gasps and folds in on himself. I waste no time sprinting away and leaping up toward the dipping sun. Pigeon takes over, shifting us right on cue, and we race back toward Kestrel City. I don’t look back at Ryn; I know he’ll recover soon and we don’t have a second to waste. If I can stay near the Avowed, he’ll stay away from me. He can’t afford for his cover to be blown over some misguided sense of responsibility. We’ll both be better off if we just go our separate ways and forget anything ever happened between us.
13
Abooming knock on my door echoes around the room, and I glare at it as I towel dry my hair. I feel like shit, I had a horrible dream where I was burning alive, and then I woke up and had the weirdest fucking hot flashes. I think I slept maybe three hours, and I got up feeling achy and gross.
I just finished a long bath and was debating crawling back into bed for the rest of the day.
The only problem with that plan is that I’m not sure if Ryn can kidnap me from here. I haven’t seen him since our altercation yesterday, but I’m not stupid enough to think the arrogant prick won’t try something.
The knock sounds off again.
“Flower? Are you there?” Treno asks on the other side of the door, and relief and excitement start pumping through me.
“Calm down, bro! You just got your itch scratched yesterday, and look how well that turned out for us,”I point out to Pigeon as she gets all fangirly inside of me.
I open the door and look up to find Treno’s smiling face. Damn. I forgot how tall he was.
“Did I wake you?” he asks, looking over my head at the crumpled bedding that’s askew all over the bed.
