And I wanted him to know how much I love him, how much he means to me. I’m still not sure about whatever I’m feeling for Ivy, if it’s a feeling at all and not some primal impulse that’s finally settled after years of being dormant, or what, but what I feel for her does not change the way I feel about him.
I don’t think anything in the world could change the way I feel about Adrien Claire.
And then he silenced me with his vicious mouth and fucked mehard.Harder than he usually does. I enjoyed it more than I probably should have, but I can’t shake the feeling that he wasn’t… completely there. With me. Just like the other night. Part of him was somewhere else. Thinking about something else.
Or perhaps… someone.
My stomach flips with nausea at the thought of him with someone else. I know it’s not fair, given current circumstances and all, but I don’t want him with anyone else. I want him for myself.
Mine.
I don’t know what’s going on with him, and I’m not certain I can blame it on Ivy or our heated kiss. But I do know something is wrong, and I don’t know how to fix it.
My mind wanders to Ivy. She’d run away so fast, after Adrien had left. I’d wanted to go to her then, but Ithought better of it because she was upset and I wasn’t sure I was the person she wanted to see, given the reason for her upset was because of me. Because I’d kissed her.
I’d kissed her and touched her, and felt her in my arms, her warmth pressed against my clothed cock, and I’d forgotten my entire sense of self. I didn’t know where I was, who I was, or what existed, excepther.Except her kiss and this throbbing energy between us that was like magic all on its own.
I tell myself I’ll check on her later, as my alarm rings, alerting me that I need to get up and get ready for art class. I’ll approach her there, and perhaps we can talk. Figure this all out. I can apologize and we can put whatever happened behind us and simply move on and then I can tell Adrien this is behind me. Behindus.
Because I know, without a doubt, I want there to be an us. Adrien and me. My heart aches at the thought, Ivy’s memory pushing forth.
No, I can’t. I should not have kissed her like that, I should not have upset her.
She is my brother’s rejected offering. My former bride to be. She is a princess, and she has been through so much already if she has arrived here, and I can not add to her trouble. I can not be another nail in her proverbial coffin. Ivy needs to settle in here and figure things out on her own, she doesn’t need a man like me—an anomaly like me—causing her any more confusion.
Still, I can’t shake the thought of her response to Chloe’s admission. About my bloodheat. I make my way to the shower, chewing on this detail, becausehonestly, it was the first time someone didn’t balk at the truth. The vampires here all give me a wide berth, especially during my bloodheat. Most of the men—aside from Adrien—don’t even want to look at me when I get those waves, and the women here, for the most part, don’t ask questions, and now they don’t really respond at all, but in the beginning, they did. They looked at me like I was truly a freak of nature, because I am.
I know that, and so do they, but no one brings it up.
I turn the hot water on and quickly set to cleaning myself up.
Ivy didn’t look at me like I was a freak. She looked at me like she was just as hungry and enticed as I felt. She looked at me like prey. And I had the faintest feeling if I didn’t stop her, she would sink her fangs into me and never let go. And I’m not sure I would put up a fight, either.
The thought of Ivy sinking her fangs into me causes my cock to twitch, but I ignore it. I’m too melancholy this morning and I don’t think jerking off is the solution I need.
I go through the motions and head to art, going over the words in my head that I want to say to Ivy. But when I get there, she’s not there.
Perhaps she’s running late.
When Chloe comes through the door, I look behind her, but no Ivy. She takes her seat next to me.
“Where’s Ivy?” I ask.
Chloe shrugs. “Not feeling well, I guess. I went to gether this morning and she told me she was sick and to tell the teach she’d be out today.”
Sick?
My stomach twists and I have a hard time believing such a thing. Call it a gut hunch or something, but I just… know.
“I see,” I say, shaking off the thought as Professor Morningside starts their lecture. I can’t concentrate because I keep thinking about last night’s events. About the bloodheat, the kiss, about Adrien and his weird behavior.
I feel like I’m grasping at straws, like I’m missing something but I have no clue what.
When class is over, I book it out of there, not bothering to stay and chat with Chloe. Adrien isn’t outside like he usually is, which also adds to my worry. He said he wasn’t mad, and we fucked, but…
Something feels off. Wrong. Like a hurricane is about to hit us all.
I nearly leap up the steps to Ivy’s room and knock on the door until she opens it.
