We sit here, watchingMy Best Friend’s Girland eat our ice cream. I laugh, even though a part of me feels the sting of the situation. A fake relationship where he falls in love with his mark? The universe fucking hates me.
Jordan’s body shifts and he leans his head on my shoulder as he licks his spoon clean.
I gaze at him, wondering if he notices the way his body presses against mine. I look down at him from where he’s settled, committing to memory the way his thick lashes frame his honey eyes. He has the prettiest eyes.
The words are lodged in my throat again, choking me.
I’ve never wanted to say them so badly, but I have to keep them to myself. I don’t think it would do either of us any good if I said them.
So instead, I wrap my arm around Jordan and pull him closer. He lets me, and that’s no small feat. I’ve never heldhimin my arms before. He feels good there. My fingers graze over his flannel shirt on his shoulder. His crisp vetiver and alpine scent is like a fog around me as my heart beats like a damn drum.
“Thanks,” he says as he leans his head back and looks up at me. “For the ice cream.”
His voice is soft, his honey eyes catching the light of the chandelier. I give him a soft smile.
“Of course.”
I love you.
I lean down and kiss him if only to distract myself from the words that want to fall out of my mouth. The words I can not fucking say because they will destroy everything.
He chuckles lightly, his hand coming up to squeeze my throat just a little bit as he kisses me, as he slides his cold tongue into my mouth.
I take his top lip between my teeth and nip it before I drive my tongue against his. I love kissing him. Every time I do, I don’t want to stop.
My phone rings, breaking the spell with its haunting melody. “Daddy Issues.”
Fuck.
I break away with a heavy sigh. I finish my pint and set it down on the table and he shifts next to me, allowingme to move. It keeps ringing, the lyrics about taking someone like a drug and tasting them on your tongue are loud.
My body stiffens and the words cut me deep.
Once, I waited forhiscall. Vance’s. I waited to hear those words or read that text that would say “Be ready for me,” and I’d jump. I’d speed over to his house, get naked, and be on my knees in a matter of fucking minutes.
Sometimes he’d come. Sometimes I’d wait all night and end up sleeping on the damn floor.
Now I’m terrified to hear his fucking voice.
I push away the thoughts threatening to pull me under. Instead, I focus my gaze on Jordan. On those pretty eyes that I could easily get lost in.
I love you.
“You gonna get that?” he asks.
I grab the phone, silence it, and put it in my back pocket.
“It’s not important.”
He looks as if he wants to press me, but he says nothing.
“What?” I ask as I realize he’s staring at me.
“Nothing,” he says, smiling at me. “I’m going to call it a night.”
“Okay,” I say, those three words taunting me.
He pulls me to him, kissing me softly before he breaks away, undressing himself as he goes. I watch the wayhe removes his shirt, watch the way his muscles move together as he does so. I let my gaze fall over his ass in his tight boxer briefs. He stops in his doorway, turning to look at me over his shoulder.
