His cock pummels into me and the tears start to fall. I grab onto him, digging my nails into his back as I meet him thrust for thrust and then I break.
“C-coming—” My voice shakes and I hate it. I hate how I sound because there’s no denying the truth.
I am broken. I am damaged.
Jordan falls back, pulling me with him until we’re sitting up straight and he grunts out a strangled sound. “Me too.”
My legs are still entangled around him and I feel my warm, wet cum spreading between us. I feelhiscum dripping out.
I bury my face against his shoulder, trying to catch my breath. His free arm holds me tight, fingers splayed at my back. His heartbeat against my chest is steady, and I time my breathing to the rhythm.
One breath.
Two breaths.
“I’m still here, Alex,” he whispers in my ear. I’ve never felt so relaxed in my life, and I think I might actually fall asleep.
“Still here,” I murmur against his shoulder.
He untangles my legs with one hand, and I fall back into bed.
I watch as he saunters off, feeling strangely sated in a way I’ve never felt before.
When he comes back, he has a towel. He wipes me up slowly, wordlessly. I watch him with my heart in my throat. There are words that are stuck there that I know I shouldn’t say.
And I can’t. Not even if I wanted to. Because if I do, I’m never going to recover. I’ll really fuck this up, and I don’t want to fuck it up.
So I don’t say them. I keep them to myself.
“Was I good?” I ask.
I realize my error the moment I hear it. I’d meant to ask ifitwas good. The sex with weepy Alex. I want him to be satisfied. I don’t want him to be freaked out. I don’t know if I can take it if he is freaked out.
What if he doesn’t—
“Shit, I meant—”
“Yes,” he says as he gets into bed beside me, pulling me close until he threads his leg between mine. “Ten out of ten. Would fuck again,” he says humorously.
That gets a genuine laugh out of me.
His lips find my neck. “And again and again.”
His voice starts to fade and I close my eyes. I’ve never slept so good.
Chapter Forty-Three
Jordan
Seeing Alex during my day at work helps it go by faster, which is why I’m hating on Tuesdays and Thursdays. Well, most of them. Today is Thursday and Alex randomly drops by with a coffee and a donut for me, which makes me happier than I can explain.
Things with us have been going great. Not at all awkward like I was worried about, but that may be because we’re still in our own little bubble. Though I’m happy to see him, I get a little nervous that he may kiss me here. Or do something else that will make what we’re doing obvious.
“So how’s your day going?” he asks as I bite into my donut.
“Slow as fuck.”
He smirks. “You miss me, don’t you?”
