“I should get back. The cabinets won’t paint themselves,” I say, leaning forward to kiss him again. Just a quick, light peck, fast enough that he can’t respond. And with that, I turn around and head back to the house, leaving him in my wake with the biggest grin on my face, my cheeks still flushed, my heart racing.
Chapter Thirty-Nine
Jordan
My brain is constantly going. I feel like it never shuts off. It’s always thinking about this and worrying about that. But as Alex walks away from me, all casual but cocky, my mind is quiet.
My heart is pounding, my skin covered in sweat.
That was by far the best orgasm I’ve ever had.
And I’m pretty sure I’ve said that every damn time my dick has been in his mouth.
How is it possible?
Sex and orgasms have always been a weird thing for me. Sometimes I do it because my body is just going through the motions. Sometimes I really want to do it but the result is less than exciting. People rant and rave about how amazing sex is, but I’ve never felt that.
Not unless it’s with Alex. And I’m still confused as hell about whether it’s him or the fact he’s a guy.
I haven’t done anything with another guy—ever. And there are only a handful of girls I’ve had sex with. I can count on two hands how many times I’ve actually had sex in my life.
The guys think I’ve slept around, and I let them think it. It’s easier than trying to explain what I’m actually feeling.
If this can feel so good with Alex, I can only imagine what more feels like. I’m not sure what more means, but I want to figure it out. It terrifies me, I just can’t quite pinpoint why.
The echo of the screen door reaches the back yard, snapping me from my thoughts and my feet start moving.
The only way I’m going to figure anything out is if I do it. I have to try. And if I don’t like it, then I don’t like it. Alex said he’d be willing to try this with me, to help me figure it out. Hopefully he understands what that fully means.
I make my way into the house and find Alex in the kitchen. The door closing has him turning to look at me, paintbrush in hand.
The light from the window is that golden sort of bright light that makes everything in its path hazy and faded. It shines across the room, slivers and slats lightingup the smudges of bright red paint on his arms and chest. His dark hair is still mussed from where I’d grabbed him. Alex has always been attractive in and out of his uniform, but seeing him like this…
Paint-splattered jeans that hug his ass perfectly, paint smears all over him with those big, wide green eyes…
“You okay?” he asks, breaking my staring spell.
I shake my head, walking toward him. I grab the paintbrush and drop it into the bucket, causing it to splash. He’s going to be pissed about that later, but I couldn’t care less.
“Jordan—”
I grip his face and smash my lips to his, walking him backwards until he hits the counter. He lets out a groan, kissing me back. He’s hard against my thigh, and I’m not sure if he’s been like this since he walked away from me outside.
Was he just going to wait for it to go away? Go take care of it in the bathroom? Why didn’t he ask me to do it for him?
“I want to know what it’s like,” I whisper against his lips.
“What what’s like?” he asks, eyes wide.
I drop a hand from his face and grab his dick, squeezing it before I can think too much about it.
I’m touching another man’s dick. No, not just another man’s dick. I’m touching Alex’s dick.Again.
I don’t hate it, and It doesn’t feel weird. When it throbs against my palm, my stomach does a flip.
I know that feeling. I like that feeling. And to know that I make Alex feel that…
His lips part, and I’m not sure he’s breathing. Obviously, he wasn’t expecting this to happen.
