“Hugging you.”
“Because you feel sorry for me after I word-vomited all my scary thoughts?”
“No. I appreciate your honesty more than you know. I gather it takes a lot for you to feel comfortable sharing stuff like that. But I honestly like helping people. It’s a big reason why I became a firefighter and a paramedic. And I can’t helpsomeone if I don’t know what’s wrong. And now that I know what you need, I’m hugging you.”
“And what do you think I need?”
“I think you need to feel cared for because you spend so much of your time caring for others. I cleaned up so you didn’t have to. And I think you need to lower your stress and blood pressure so I’m hugging you.”
“So why aren’t you letting me go?”
“Because ten seconds into a hug, oxytocin is released. And studies show that at twenty seconds, your stress and blood pressure decrease as more oxytocin and dopamine are released.”
“I think it’s been twenty seconds,” she grumbles.
“This is really hard for ya, isn’t it?”
“You have no idea.”
“I’ll start counting once you fully surrender. Right now, this isn’t a hug, you’re just trapped in my arms.”
“Fine.” She places her cheek against my chest, and as I count in my head, I slowly feel her relax against me. A few seconds in, I feel her arms wrap around my lower back, and I smile against the top of her head.
When I get to twenty, I wait for her to let go, and when she doesn’t, I hold her for a while longer, basking in this moment.
“Okay. I think I’m good,” she says, dropping her hands.
I search her eyes, enjoying the look of peace I find. “How do you feel?”
“I do actually feel better.” She places her hands on my chest, holding my gaze.
I couldn’t look away if I tried. I want her to look at me like this every day.
“Can I at least repay the favor?” she asks, starting to lower to her knees as her hands drag slowly down my abdomen, stopping on my belt.
“That’s not why I did all this,” I say, gripping her wrist and pulling her up.
“Are you actually turning down a blow job?”
“I can’t believe I’m saying this, but I’d rather kiss your lips,” I admit.
The hurt look on her face stabs at my chest.
“It’s not that I wouldn’t enjoy that,” I rush to assure her. “I would. Immensely. But right now, I want the one thing you’re not willing to give me. And while your lips wrapped around my cock is something I will fantasize about while I jack myself in the shower tonight, I’d rather kiss you until you’re gasping for air, so consumed by my lips on yours that you’ll want to throw away all your rules and restrictions.”
“Oh.” She blinks up at me. “We shouldn’t.”
I lean down and kiss her forehead. “Thank you for tonight. I had fun.”
Not wanting to wear out my welcome, I turn and head for the door.
“Tomorrow!” she calls out, halting me as my hand grips the brass doorknob.
I turn around to look at her. “What’s tomorrow?”
“The boys have a playdate in the evening for a few hours.” She twists her hands in front of her. “If you want to grab dinner or whatever, I have some free time.”
“I would love to take you out. Let me know when, and I’ll be there.”
