I’d never felt my mom’s grief, if she had any, in a lasting way. I only remembered her as loving and supportive.
Vivian could choke on her inheritance for all I cared. My parents hadn’t given me that, but they’d given me more—love so great I almost hadn’t survived losing it.
I only did because I developed a string of really unhealthy coping mechanisms in their absence. Coping mechanisms I kept getting smacked in the face with, as they created bigger problems in my life.Like letting my fear of losing Max keep mefrom fighting for the truth in that room. I hadn’t had faith in him to do the right thing.
Given up when I should’ve pushed harder.
Reacted to that old wound instead of remembering what he’d shown me. And I was still doing it.
Even now, I stood alone in a dark area, after everything that had happened, because I reacted to Vivian’s bait. I wanted to fight with her because of what she’d done to me, because of Max, and just because of her stupid, smug face.
Something about her made me see red, and I reacted instead of using my head. Getting myself nowhere but out in the open, like a sitting duck, by doing it.
Growling at my actions, I turned to head back to the courtyard, only to find my path blocked.
Izzy smiled. “Hey, it’s almost time to go to the parlor, so I wanted to come find you.”
“Thanks.” I released a breath, slowing my heartbeat. “I just needed to get away after…”
“I get it.” She reached out carefully, touching my arm when I didn’t flinch. “Hey. You got a few of them to think about what they wanted for a minute. They were still talking about things when I came to get you. Looking past what their parents wanted.”
“You sure that was me or just the impending threat of being kicked out of The Quest?” I grumbled, aware I was in a mood.
But Izzy tilted her head. “Aren’t they both because of you?”
My brow furrowed.
“Elaine, whether or not she realizes it, listened to what you said that day at the Maiden Appeal. None of us knew about the statute. At least, not that I know of.”
I frowned. “She’ll never admit it, and according to Vivian, I haven’t done anything useful.”
She shrugged. “Ignore Vivian, if you can. She might not stand up and fight for what’s right, but that doesn’t mean everyone feels that way. It’s brave—what you did and what you said. If more of them see it doesn’t have to be like this, see you keep going, they might find a reason to fight, too.”
I smiled at her, her words brightening my sullen outlook. At least, a little bit.
Maybe the way I responded to things wasn’t just a string of unhealthy coping mechanisms. Or, even if it was, maybe there was good in that, too.
Take that, grief counselor.
“I didn’t think about it like that. Thanks, Izzy.”
“Of course.” Her genuine smile eased the lingering tension in my shoulders. “Want to head back inside?”
“I’ll be right behind you. I just…need another minute.”
With a nod, she returned to Camelot Courtyard.
I stepped onto the grass, pulled toward the lake at the end of the lawn. The moon shimmered over the dark surface of the water, and I stared at it for longer than I should’ve.
But eventually, I turned to go back inside.
Only to have my moment of solitude interrupted, again, by the last person I expected to find on the patio.
Max Dread.
Kingston
Everyone gathered in a circle around my father.
