Slowly, I pulled the hem of my t-shirt over my head. I heaved a breath, and I took his hand.
His eyes were on my face, staring at me like he couldn’t believe I was real, and they never faltered. Even as I brought his hand up to the skin underneath my left breast.
“Last year, I almost lost my virginity. But my ex, he…The night we planned to spend together, I got cold feet and chickened out. At least, that was how I thought about it for a long time after. But the truth was that deep down, he never saw me. Not really. Not the way I’ve felt seen since coming here.”
Kingston touched the small scar on my ribcage, still as red and angry as ever.
“He’d picked me up for our date, so when I changed my mind and wanted to go home, I had to call my dad to come get me. My ex had stormed out and left me at his place, and I just wanted to go home. And my dad…”
My throat tightened, but Kingston filled in the words I wanted to release.
“He showed up for you.”
I nodded, swallowing deeply. “He always did. He was?—”
Tears pricked my eyes as the memories resurfaced, and I fought hard to keep them at bay, wanting to share this.
“I could’ve just spent the night. Waited for my ex to come back or made him take me home the next morning, but I wanted to go home. I wanted to be where I felt safe and seen. So, I made the call.”
Kingston’s thumb pressed lightly against the scar, and he leaned forward to kiss the angry mark.
“The roads were wet, and a truck…It came out of nowhere, and it all happened so quickly. One second we were driving and singing along to the radio, and the next, the impact came. The car flipped. And I tried. I just—I couldn’t get out of my seat belt. I tried so hard, but I couldn’t get free.” My heart raced the way it always did when I thought of that night. “Kingston, I couldn’t get to him.”
His arms came around my waist, holding me tightly as tears slipped down my cheeks.
“I can still picture it. The moment he took his last breath. I still—I hear it sometimes. It was all I heard for the longest time after. And I almost…I didn’t think I deserved?—”
He lifted his head, blue-gray eyes meeting mine as I fought to release the truth.
“I just wanted it to be over. Because if I hadn’t called him, he’d still be here. And that scar”—I brought his hand up to my scalp—“and this one, have always been painful reminders of my biggest regret.”
My eyes burned as I ran his fingers along the ridge of my scar. It tingled the way it always did.
“I kept all the pain and guilt locked away inside me. But I would tug on my scar whenever it tried to come out. Whenever I struggled or things went wrong. Whenever it felt like I’d lost everything, I reminded myself why. Maybe…for the same reason you rubbed your wound.”
Kingston gripped my chin, locking our eyes as a tear slipped down my cheek. “You didn’t deserve to struggle for making that call, Quinn.”
“Then you didn’t deservethat, either.”
He held my gaze, his face a war of emotions as he took in my words. But he finally nodded and loosened his grip.
“The scars aren’t there to remind us we have nothing to live for, or that we don’t deserve to. For me, that was…grief.The darkest part of it, and I do feel like I’ve let that thought go. Maybe because now, my scars feel different. Like reminders of why I need to keep going. Keep fighting.”
He tilted his head in question.
“Because I survived. Good or bad, I got to keep my life while his was taken. Wrong or right—guilty or innocent—I’m the one still here. And I have to believe there’s a reason for that.”
He slid his hand into my hair, brushing my cheek.
“You, know, my dad—honestly, he would’ve loved you.” I choked out a laugh, more sure of that than anything else. “You, with all your secrets. And if he had seen what I’ve seen since I came here, he would’ve stayed, too. He would’ve fought for you. So, if it wasn’t my time on that bridge, and if that night ultimately led me here, then…Maybe that’s why.”
“You think he would’ve tried to stop this, too?”
I nodded. “I do. Even if, like me, he would’ve been woefully out of his element, he would’ve used all his years hunting for secrets as a researcher to help in whatever way he could. Iknowthat’s true.”
“But fate sent you instead.”
“Exactly. So, there will be more sass and curse words along the way. Sleep shirts, too, but…I’m fighting for this. Fighting foryou. And those terrible parts of my past? The dark parts, I see them differently now.”
