“We had no idea.”
Kingston smiled. “You weren’t supposed to know. The rules specify that we can’t tell you so the cameras won’t sway how people act or react.”
With a sheepish glance at him, I guessed, “That means you saw my…disagreement with Elaine the first day.”
“I did.” He beamed. “And thankfully, the camera picked up her touching you first. So, she can’t do anything about it. If she wanted to try.”
“That’s a relief, at least.”
He nodded, leading me over to the chair. After moving the laptop, he sat down and pulled me onto his lap. “I’ll share the official scores with everyone tomorrow, but you’re in a good spot for the next challenge. You made some decisions that scored you a lot of points. You’re not in the top spot, but you don’t need to be for the next challenge.”
“What about Izzy, Morgan, and Angela?”
“They did very well, too. If it hadn’t been for the lockdown, you’d be ahead of both of them.”
“Yeah, well, I couldn’t help it. Guess that means Vivian’s right there with me, huh?”
He shook his head. “She didn’t earn back as many points as you did. She’s closer to the bottom than I would’ve expected her to be.”
“And what about the futureMrs. D’Arthur? Where’s she?”
“In my arms,” he said simply.
My cheeks flooded with heat because even though the logistics of that didn’t work with three men holding my heart, I did love that he’d said it, and the thought of it. In theory, of course. I had no idea why it made me blush so hard, but then, Kingston always seemed able to turn me into a total dork.
I kissed him, soaking up the happiness for a minute before thoughts of everything else reared back up. When I pulled back and rested my head on his chest, wanting to simply be there with him, he tipped my chin up so he could search my face.
“What’s on your mind?”
“I’m not sure. Just…I had a really good time today with some of the other girls. And then, there’s being here with you. I definitely need a four-person cuddle party to happen soon, but I’m not even worried about that. I know we’ll get there. So…I’m really happy, right now.” I chewed on my lip. “Maybe I’m nervous because of that? Waiting for the other shoe to drop?”
His eyes held the same understanding they always did.
And it shouldn’t have surprised me that Kingston felt the way I did, but I wasn’t expecting him to pick up on exactly what I’d felt.
He tucked a strand of hair behind my ear. “I spent most of today convincing myself last night hadn’t been a dream.”
“If it was, it’s definitely in my top five.” I teased him, deserving the nip on my earlobe that followed.
The only thing that topped it was my last memory with my mom and dad, and a placeholder for the spot that would inevitably be filled by my first night with all three of them.
“But…why is it so hard to believe we can keep good things?”
“Because life already took something from you. And when it happens unexpectedly, or by choice, I think losing someone we love, it drives home that nothing in this life is permanent. It adds a layer of grief to our happiest moments, knowing that, eventually, this will be taken from us, too. Hopefully, for natural causes and nothing unexpected but either way—” He held my gaze. “I thought I’d failed once already, Quinn. For me, even if that loss comes now, or in a hundred years, it won’t lessen the pain of losing you.”
“You’d think we’d swear off letting anyone in to avoid all that,” I tried to joke.
“All we can do is hold onto the good for as long as we have it. Appreciate it. I’d rather have these moments and go through that pain, than never get the chance to love you.”
He kissed me then, taking his time like he was savoring it. Committing it to memory. And I followed his lead, because as much as it would hurt to lose any of them, I agreed with him. I wouldn’t give up this time or this chance to be with them.
And I’d fight like hell to hold onto it for as long as I could.
When he pulled back and pressed our foreheads together, our promise to each other came easily.
“I’m with you.”
“Good, then let me take you to bed and show you how much I appreciate this time I get to share with you.”
