The room seems to freeze, suspended in the weight of my words. My heartbeat pounds so loud in my ears, I almost miss his soft voice.
“I know.”
I blink. “What?”
He looks up at me and shrugs, all nonchalance. “I kinda figured.”
I gape. “You—what?”
Ben grins like it’s the most obvious thing in the universe. “He looks at me like you do. And when he talks, his voice gets all low and soft like when you tell stories at night. And he smells like fire and metal and candy—just like my dreams.”
My throat closes up. I press my forehead to his and laugh, a wet, shaky sound that bursts from the ache in my chest.
“You smart little fox,” I whisper.
“Mom,” he says seriously, “I’m not mad. I’m glad. I wanted it to be him.”
I hug him tighter than I probably should, and he squeaks.
Later that evening,we take the transport to a holopark that glows like a carnival on stardust—neon-lit walkways, floating platforms, digital flora that shifts with your mood.
Jav is already there, waiting near the hoverboard loop, looking nervous. His hands twitch like he doesn’t know what to do with them, but his smile softens when he sees us.
“Hey, cub,” he calls out.
Ben bolts from my side like a shot, arms flung wide. Jav scoops him up mid-run and spins him once before settling him on his hip.
I walk slower. Still cautious. Still feeling like I’m balancing joy and panic on the edge of a blade.
“Hoverboard lesson, huh?”I ask, folding my arms.
Jav grins, setting Ben down gently. “I promised him.”
Ben grabs his hand and tugs him toward the loop. “Let’s go! I already wore the pads like you said.”
I watch them from the edge of the park. Jav kneels to secure Ben’s wrist guards, walking him through balance techniques, his voice patient and clear. They look like they’ve done this a hundred times.
My heart aches with it.
I should feel whole.
But instead, I feel fragile.
Like I’m borrowing happiness I haven’t earned.
Ben topples a few times,laughing. Jav never lets him fall too hard.
And me?
I stand at the edge of this glowing little world they’re building, hands cold in my coat pockets, wondering if this is what peace is supposed to feel like—this quiet, unspeakable terror that it won’t last.
When Ben finally wobbles half a loop around the track without crashing, he throws his arms up in victory. Jav whoops like a proud fool and high-fives him so hard their hands echo.
I smile.
And I almost believe we’ve made it.
We walk home under a sky freckled with stars. Ben passes out in the seat before we’re even halfway back.
