The deep voice of wisdom continued, “You’d have no cousins, lad. No aunts or uncles. Obviously you wouldn’t exist either, but you do understand what I’m trying to tell you?”
He nodded, because this man had given him an important insight.
“Maddie enriched my life in so many ways, and as painful as it was to lose her, it was my honor to hold her in my arms and ease her passing. She’d done so much for me over the years, given me children, grandchildren, loved me with all my faults. She gave me a reason to come home from battle, son. And everyone needs that.”
Alex Grant paused, gathering his thoughts before he put an end to the conversation.
“As do you, Alasdair. Don’t send her away because you’re afraid to feel. It’s what gives your life meaning and passion. Scotland is headed into a dark time, and you will need someone, possibly Emmalin, possibly someone else, to carry you through.”
Alasdair had no words to say to his grandsire, and so he simply listened.
“Someday, lad, you’ll learn to savor those things, because they are the moments you’ll always remember.”
Chapter Eleven
Emmalin depends on the wisdom of Alex when it comes to Longshanks…
Emmalin changed for dinner and made her way down to the great hall. Surprised at how much her muscles hurt from her first few lessons, she vowed to continue to make her sword skills stronger, if not to make Alasdair proud of her, but in the hope her sire was watching from the heavens above. She sat at one of the trestle tables with Alasdair and Alex Grant that evening.His three cousins were also present, Elshander, Alick, and Dyna, along with her mother, Sela Grant.
“Tell me again what the messengers told you about your husband,” Alex said.
“They informed me of my husband’s death and said I needed to meet the king at Berwick in a fortnight.”
“And how did he die?” Sela asked.
“An attack of boars.” She was glad the fair-haired woman had spoken because it offered her the chance to look at her. Sela Grant had an ethereal quality, a powerful aura, something she had to admire. The similarities between mother and daughter were arresting, and they both acted as though they were unaware of their beauty.
Alasdair said, “Given what we know about Longshanks, I suspect he has a plan. As belligerent as he has proven when it comes to the Scots, I doubt he’ll have much sympathy for you. His only concern will be what he can gain from the baron’s death.”
Her stomach did the familiar sinking whenever the king’s name was mentioned. It was inherently bad news for her whenever King Edward was involved. “Aye, and as we discussed the other day, I suspect his plan is to marry me off to someone else.” The thought of marrying another stranger made her ill. Especially since she would much prefer to explore her new feelings for Alasdair.
“You are but a pawn in the eyes of the king,” Alex said. “Longshanks gives land to his favored barons, so they’re always seeking to add to their holdings,” Alex said. “There could be several barons who will seek you out once word gets around about your husband’s death. I’m sorry the truth is not better for you. I wish he would give you a mourning season, but I have my doubts that he is considerate of any Scot, even a woman. He will choose whomever he feels he owes the most.”
Emmalin nodded again. “And suppose one of those barons is disgruntled that the king chose another…”
“Aye, and he decided to take what he wanted by force, bypassing the king’s approval. Once a marriage is sanctioned by the church, even the king will not argue.”
“But the plan didn’t work,” Dyna said. “So several men could still be looking for Emmalin.”
Alex nodded. “I would hope not several, but more than one.”
Emmalin had heard enough. Her entire life had been uprooted within the last year, and here it was happening again. It seemed any glimmer of happiness would be stolen from her. She would be controlled and dominated again, her land taken from her. “Forgive me, but I would like to go to my chamber. I still have a few days before I must report to Berwick, and I need my rest.”
Alasdair and his two cousins all rose as soon as she stood from her chair. Dyna was chatting with her mother, so neither of them moved. The others sat down again, but he followed her. She stopped him at the bottom of the staircase. “Please, you need not escort me to my chamber. ’Tis not far and you should stay and discuss matters with your cousins.”
“Are you sure you’re hale?”
She smiled, doing everything in her power to hold back tears. If she gave in, they’d flood her cheeks and she’d probably fall against this handsome man and sob her heart out. Unfortunately, the curtain of darkness that had fallen over her at the possibility of being forced to marry another like Langley was too much. Suddenly exhausted, she needed to be alone.
Her dignity prevented that from transpiring. “I’ll be fine, Alasdair. As I said, I am just tired.” She grabbed her heavy skirts and lifted them so as not to trip on the steps. Although she’d seen the disappointment in his eyes, she would not turn back.She would not allow him to see her fall apart this eve after all he’d done for her.
She’d gladly do it in her chamber where no one could bear witness.
Once inside, she closed the door and fell against it, the tears finally falling from her eyes. She cried until she had no more. How she wished her dear sire would show up at the door to tell her what to do.
She was lost.
Should she trust the Grants? Trust the English king?
