I should feel relieved because he’s being sensible and smart, and he’s protecting both of us. Instead, I feel rejected.
“Perfect,” I say. “Might find me a one-night stand tonight.”
“I fucking dare you.” He gets up and moves to a seat somewhere behind me, leaving me to sit in my turmoil.
After we get on the plane, I spend the flight staring out the window and telling myself this is for the best. When a tear threatens to spill because I’m so pissed that I even care, I pull my hoodie over my head and pretend to sleep.
When we land in Chicago, it’s gloomy and cold, the kind that seeps into my bones regardless of how many layers I have on. When I make it to my room, I know Patterson is on the other side because the W kept my request, and now I wish I hadn’t asked because the restraint I’m forced to keep is brutal. I press my palm against the door that separates us and hate myself for wanting him to knock.
At dinner, he sits at the opposite end of the table and doesn’t look at me once, but I know exactly where he is at every moment because his presence is like a low hum beneath my skin. By the time dessert arrives, I excuse myself early and take the elevator alone. When I get to my room, I slide into the shower, wanting to feel something other than the constant buzzing he’s left me with.
Why do I care if our arrangement stays in New York?
My phone rings while I’m toweling off.
“Hey, stranger,” Addison says, and I put it on speaker. “How’s the road trip treating you?”
“Exhausting.” I slide on the hotel robe, then move to the fluffy bed, lie back on it, and stare at the high ceiling. “Right now, I’m running on caffeine and spite.”
“Aw.” I can hear her smile through the phone. “At least you’re getting good reference shots, right?”
“Yeah, the photos have been great.”
“And my brother? Is he behaving himself?”
My breath catches. “Which one?”
“Patterson, obviously.” She laughs. “Unless you’ve chatted with Jameson again.”
I swallow hard, almost forgetting that I spoke with Jameson. “I haven’t really talked to either of them.” It’s technically the truth because Patterson and I don’t discuss much when we’re together and alone. “Also, right now, Pattycakes and I are keeping our distance. If I don’t see him for the rest of the trip, great.”
“You know, this morning, I told him to stop being such a dick toward you.”
“What?”
“Because you’re my bestie and I know how he gets around you. He can only keep it together for so long before he loses his shit.” She pauses. “Oh, before I forget, I’m keeping tabs on him.”
I sit up straighter. “Um, why?”
“He’s acting weird. I’m convinced he’s secretly seeing someone, and I need to find out who.”
“What else is new? He’s always seeing someone,” I tell her.
“No. Like someone regularly. He and Jameson both do this thing—I can’t explain it. Not to mention, he’s being cagey when I ask about his love life. Something’s definitely up.”
“Who knows? Maybe you’ll get a sister-in-law soon,” I offer.
“Ha. Doubtful.” She pauses. “But I do hope when either of them starts dating again, it’s someone I actually like. You would be perfect.”
My face heats. “Yeah, well, that didn’t work out, did it? Guess we’ll have to stay besties forever.”
She laughs. “If you see anything, will you tell me? If I had to guess, I’d think it’s Mila. He was photographed kissing her a few weeks ago. Um, she works for Bellamore, I think.”
“The fashion company?” I ask.
“Yeah, I realized the other day that he’s gone on more than one date with her. At least seven times over the past two years. That’s not typical of Patterson.”
I dig my nails into my palm. “No?”
