When I drift off, I dream of whiskey and blue-green eyes and a kiss that tasted like the end of everything.
7
PATTERSON
I’ve barely slept because every time I close my eyes, I imagine Kendall’s mouth on mine and her fingers twisting in my shirt. That sound she made when my thigh pressed between hers woke me at three in the morning, aroused and furious. I stared at the ceiling until my alarm went off, and then I dragged myself out of bed.
Today, I’m running on caffeine and spite because Kendall fucking Hart kissed me, and my body won’t let me forget it enough to even rest.
The drive to the Bronx takes longer than I wanted with weekend traffic, but it gives me time to breathe. Every other Saturday, I show up at the Kingsbridge Ice Center and teach a group of eight- to twelve-year-olds how to skate, shoot, and take a hit without crying about it.
The Cross Ice Foundation was started seven years ago when I realized I had more money than I knew what to do with. I also knew that a lot of kids in the city would never touch a hockey stick without someone handing them one first. Now, I’m dedicated to sharing the love of the sport.
Marcus, my assistant coach, is already running warm-up drills when I arrive. A kid named Tommy spots me first and nearly wipes out trying to wave.
“Coach P! You’re late!”
“I’m five minutes early. Maybe you’re impatient?”
“My mom says patience is a virtue. Whatever that means!” He grins and skates off to join the others.
I hit the ice and run them through drills for the next hour. Hockey isn’t on the radar for most kids, and an ice rink is a thing that’s only seen in movies. Giving them a place to channel their energy is exactly why I started this program. Someone did it for my brother and me around this age, and I swore that when I was financially stable, I would pay it forward. I’ll do this until I can’t.
Even here, as I watch a group of kids tease one another, Kendall forces her way into my thoughts. Her face flashes through my mind. That night, her brown eyes darkened before she grabbed me. I push harder on the ice, trying to skate her out of my memory.
Marcus calls for a break, and the kids pile toward the snack table. As I turn my head, that’s when I catch a glimpse of my little sister walking toward me in a cashmere coat and designer boots, wearing a scowl.
“I need to speak to you. Now,” she says when she’s close.
I glance around the room of kids and then make eye contact with Marcus. I lead my sister to the hallway and cross my arms over my chest.
“What?”
She holds up her screen to show me a tabloid photo from Thursday night. It’s one of me leaving Diamond with my arm around a brunette whose name I can’t fully even remember. Was it Caroline?
“Care to explain this?” she asks.
This woman had too much to drink, so I helped her to her car. Nothing happened, but the way she’s looking up at me, holding me, looks damning.
“What’s there to explain?”
“You kissed my best friend Thursday night and then left with another woman right after?”
“No, no, no. I absolutely did not. Kendall kissedme.”
“And you didn’t kiss her back?”
I blink at her, knowing I did, knowing I lost control too. Did Kendall tell her that?
“I told her to leave me the fuck alone. And I’m about to tell you the same thing. I come here to escape, Addison. Don’t bring that shit here.” I shake my head. “I’m not having this conversation.”
“Just trying to figure out why my bestie is so confused by what happened at Diamond. She hasn’t been the same since that night. Why?”
“No idea. Maybe you should ask her that, not me. I don’t control the way she feels.” It comes out harsh, but I don’t take it back. “Nothing has changed, Addison. I’ve told you a handful of times I don’t want to be around her. And I don’t have enough time to list every fucking reason why I don’t like her as a person. Now, if you’ll excuse me, I have shit to do today. I’m not playing these games with you or Kendall. I’m busy.”
Addison shakes her head. “You have no idea who Kendall is because you’ve never given her a fucking chance. She’s the most straightforward person I’ve ever met. She’s kind and caring, and she has a huge heart. You’re a dick.”
“Are you finished?” I ask.
