Stephen glances across at me, puts up his hand and waves, then turns back to his invisible interlocutor, speaks, listens, and then laughs.
‘I think we need to think about my wages if there are two houses,’ says Aimée.
I ignore her, as I’m feeling a pang of what might be jealousy, but it feels to me more like a shot of icy anger. I tap the window again, firmly this time. Stephen waves his hand towards me, but this time without glancing.
‘Fuck you!’ I say, which makes Aimée sigh and leave in a strop.
I decide that I’m going to punish Stephen’s insolence by having a public row. I head for the front door, but Nathan is already rushing down the stairs calling ‘Daddy’ in a way he never calls ‘Mummy’.
I open the door, and Nathan trundles down the steps, shouting. Stephen turns immediately, of course, and his face breaks into a huge and genuine smile full of warmth and delight. A face I’ve not seen myself for some years.
‘Hello, darling!’ I say, as Stephen heaves Nathan high in the air and kisses his belly.
‘Hi,’ he says.
As I arrive at the gate, I stop dead. The out-of-sight subject of Stephen’s interest is a man sitting in a wheelchair. A man with a beard, carrying a bunch of flowers.
Matthew Hollis looks at me. I look at Hollis and grit my teeth. I am wondering what he’s said, why he’s here and what I’m going to do to him, all in a single moment.
‘And who’s this?’ I ask, feigning ignorance.
‘I’m just looking for an old girlfriend,’ says Hollis, holding up the flowers and smiling at me as if he’s practised at such deception.
‘Apparently, she might’ve lived in our house at one time. I told him we’ve been here for years. Do you remember the name of the woman we bought it from?’
‘No, but I do remember she died soon after,’ I say, and glare at Hollis.
‘Really?’ says Stephen, with Nathan now upside down, dangling by his ankles.
‘Good luck with your search,’ I say, taking Stephen’s arm and tugging him through the gate.
Stephen pulls away from me and swings Nathan upright. Nathan squeals in delight and they chase each other up the path into the house.
I am left standing there with Hollis.
‘You don’t answer my calls,’ he says.
‘There’s a good reason for that. Stephen’s divorcing me,’ I say. ‘So I’ve been a touch preoccupied.’
‘Shit,’ he says. ‘I didn’t know. But that’s good news for us, right?’
‘Yes, I suppose it is, but I’ve got a lot to think about, and none of it is helped by you turning up in the middle of my life like this. OK?’
He nods apologetically, and hands me the flowers.
I head back to the house, stuffing the flowers in the bin on the way in. Stephen has Nathan on the floor and he’s tickling his feet with his stubble. I pick Nathan off the floor and tell him to hide in the playroom and Daddy will try to find him. Nathan runs off, giggling.
‘Your mum called while you were out,’ I say. ‘She’s taking some time to recover, isn’t she?’
‘It takes time.’
‘Have you discussed euthanasia?’
‘Lalla,’ he chides, as if I’m joking, which I most certainly am not. I doubt that Madeleine is remotely ill now, but it serves her purpose to draw him away from me.
‘Are you all right?’ he says. ‘Shouldn’t we start talking about the whys and wherefores?’
‘About what?’
