“Your death led to the destruction of the Realms when Kahssiel enacted his vengeance,” Yelrakel continued. “They banded together and fought him. He died for you then, but you can spare him now, My Queen. Please, do not let history repeat itself.”
Cassiel scowled at her in angry disbelief. “You have said quite enough.”
“Only one of you can live, sire. Please, I must assure you of your future. If she loves you, she will sacrifice herself in your stead.”
“General!” Cassiel roared, making Dyna flinch. He forced a breath through his lungs and said with a frightening measure of control, “I dismiss you from your duties here. Leave now before I do something I may regret.”
Her gray wings went limp and Yelrakel expelled a stricken breath. Composing herself, she bowed deep. “Sire.”
She stepped back into the hall with Sowmya and shut the door.
Picking Dyna up, Cassiel placed her in a chair at the dining table in his room and kneeled in front of her. She blinked at the ground slowly. He took her cold hands in his. “Dyna, look at me.”
“My nightmares…” she mumbled. “Every night, for weeks … I dreamed of falling, of someone pushing me into a chasm. I had been reliving my death...” Tears gathered on her lashes as she met his gaze. “And you knew.”
At the hurt and anger swimming in her eyes, Cassiel lowered his head.
Dyna pulled her hands away. “I cannot let you relive the same fate. You said that to me … before you left.”
He stood and rubbed his face. “I thought the best thing was to leave, Dyna. To keep you safe.”
“Were you ever going to tell me?”
Cassiel couldn’t answer.
“You are incorrigible.” Dyna pushed to her feet, her voice catching with emotion and resentment. “Why didn’t you share your burden with me? Why did you run away instead of facing this with me? Why did you erase my memories? Why couldn’t you simply be honest with me!”
“Because I was afraid!” he shouted, making her flinch back. The action tore at him. Cassiel immediately backed away, because he never wanted her to fear him. He kept putting space between them until his back hit the wall. He leaned up against it and closed his eyes. “I was afraid to speak the words ... and make them true.”
His confession fell into the quiet room, filling the void between them. Dyna shook her head and stepped onto a balcony with flowering bushes. Her red hair fluttered in the wind as she leaned on the stone banister, watching the rainfall over the land.
“Am I to be killed for merely being your wife?” she murmured as he joined her outside.
“I will never let that happen,” Cassiel said, coming to stand beside her. “I broke my soul to protect you. I left to wage war against anyone one who would harm you. I would spill any amount of blood, even my own, for there is nothing I wouldn’t do for you,lev sheli. You are, without question, my only priority.” He turned her face to look at him. “I know you’re scared, but please trust me.”
“Trust you?” She jerked her chin out of his hold. “That worked out so well for me before.” Her bitter scoff fogged in the cool air andtears shone in her eyes. “I asked you more than once to tell me the truth. I gave you a chance, but you couldn’t trust me with that. Instead, you selfishly hid everything and left me behind.”
“I only wanted to give you the life you deserved,” he said softly. “You didn’t have one in our first life, but by all the Gods, I swore you would live in this one. I don’t care what the cost is.” He braced his fists on the banister, flames flickering over his fingers. “Because I’m terrified of what I will do to the world if you are gone. You died a horrible death that I couldn’t save you from. I left to prevent that from happening again.”
“No. Youranaway. One thing I’ve learned is you can’t run when you’re afraid, Cassiel. That is not love.”
How could that be true when she was his reason for living? He loved her so much, but maybe it was the wrong kind of love.
“I thought I understood you better than anyone, but I don’t know you anymore.” Dyna wrapped her arms around herself. “Worst yet … I don’t even know myself.”
Cassiel looked out at the Kingdom of Greenwood, searching for answers in the green hills and gray skies. “I don’t know who I am anymore, either. I was once so certain of who I was. A third-born prince with sullied blood, unwanted and unneeded, and relatively … purposeless. Life had no meaning, and I didn’t care. There was nothing to care about. I had no place in the world, or so I thought, until you arrived.”
The wind picked up as they faced each other.
He reached for her hair, taking a short lock in his fingers. “I stumbled upon this delicate, reckless human, who became so precious to me, I was poisoned with a terrible fear that she would break. So I did the worst thing in my life by breaking her heart, because it meant she would live. In my mind, I thought I was keeping you safe from the darkness of our past, including my own.”
Dyna’s eyes glistened wet as she listened to his raw words. It reminded him of that day in the snow, when he shared everything he held inside. Because she was the one person he could show everything to, and he had forgotten that.
“Then my existence depended entirely on the future I fought to give you. I would kill for you, Dynalya. I have killed for you. I have done horrible things that make me unworthy of you. Agreed. I was never worthy of anything. But you are. Before you, I didn’t understand what it meant to care for someone. To love them … because I couldn’t remember what it felt to be loved. But the night we were wed, when you came down the steps in your white gown and chose me, I knew I would do anything for you.” Cassiel took her hands in his as tears rolled down her cheeks. “Call me a coward if you must, and deem me terrible and worthless, but please do not deny my love for you. I hate that I hurt you, and I hate that you hate me.” He pulled her into the shelter of his wings, holding her against his chest. “But I will endure it because everything I do, no matter how painful, will always be to protect you.”
Dyna had told him his vows no longer mattered. But there was no other vow more valid than this one. It was chiseled in his bones, inscribed on his skin, woven through whatever matter that made up the threads of his soul.
They stayed that way for a moment, breathing each other in. She trembled in his arms, her tears soaking his tunic. Now that it was all out there, he clung to that last kernel of hope she could forgive him.
