The sadness on her face sent a wash of cold guilt and shock through him. The Madness was getting stronger. It had lulled him so easily.
Zev sighed. “I’m not going anywhere.”
Neither of them missed that a promise went unsaid. He couldn’t promise that he wouldn’t leave one day. Dyna was his anchor, the only thing keeping the Madness at bay. But the wolf instinct to protect family constantly warred with the rotten corners of himself that wanted no more of this life, and it was losing.
He lived to keep her safe, but he didn’t know if that was needed anymore. The journey began with only the two of them until the prince joined, and now the elf. A guardian of divine blood and a guardian to guide her steps. Two capable warriors. He wasn’t needed as a protector or a Guidelander anymore. They’d taken those roles from him. After nearly killing her twice, she had to understand he was better off dead.
“Whatever you’re thinking,” Dyna said, searching his face, “you’re wrong.”
The warped scars on his wrists where the silver cuffs had burned him so terribly had become waxy and discolored. Besides the Madness, the Other also kept him company. It was the vicious side of him that killed anything in its path. Its presence lurked inside of him too, waiting for the one night of the month the moon would set it free. Why keep fighting what he was?
Dyna laid a hand over the scars. “I know you can learn to control the Other. Uncle Belzev believed it possible.”
Such a belief got his father killed. Grief welled heavily in Zev’s chest. His vision burned as memories attacked his mind. Blood seeping through the wooden planks of the floor. The broken window. His mother’s screams.
Zev closed his eyes. Why had his father left him unchained? Why had he believed the Other would submit to him? Was there a trick he failed to learn? Who could he ask now? As far as he knew, he was the only one of his kind. Werewolves didn’t rear half-breed pups.
“Don’t lose hope, Zev.”
Relying on hope was like kissing the edge of a knife and expecting not to be cut.
“I’ve long given up on that,” Zev said as he added a log to the pile he carried. “This is who I am.”
Dyna shook her head. “Well, I haven’t. Neither should you.”
He sighed, but didn’t argue. They wandered through the forest as she continued gathering more kindling. Her usual humming and excited chatter were absent today. What caused this uncharacteristic silence? It couldn’t be because of him. She’d not been her lively self since yesterday morning. Since she went in search of Cassiel.
Zev glanced through the trees, where he heard the prince grumble about something to Lord Norrlen. Where Dyna’s cheer had reduced, Cassiel’s unpleasantness had increased. His distant manner returned after the events of Corron.
It must have been hard on him, killing all of those Raiders for Dyna’s sake. But this discord between them was new. Did he resent her for losing his divinity? King Yoel said the God of Urn damned Celestials who took human lives. Something Zev could sympathize with. Life had damned him a long time ago.
“Dyna?”
She stopped, facing a tree, and her back tensed.
What’s wrong?He wanted to ask, but by her stiff shoulders, she dreaded the question. It only concerned him further. What had Cassiel done? He had a way with words, and most of them were unkind.
“What are we doing here?” Zev asked instead.
“We had to help her,” she murmured.
“Aye, but why are we still here?”
Zev was ready to move on. He didn’t think it would be wise to linger around Lucenna much longer. After what had happened in the tent, it confirmed how dangerous she could be, and if more Enforcers came searching for her, that would put Dyna at risk.
The sorceress clearly wanted nothing to do with them, and she didn’t trust them, for good reason. But they shouldn’t stay where they were unwanted. He could only guess it had something to do with Dyna’s kind heart. Helping people was simply ingrained in her.
“Do you recognize the medallion she wears?” Dyna asked, turning around.
He shook his head.
“It’s the Luna Medallion.” At his obvious confusion, she frowned. “It’s the twin to the Sol Medallion, do you not remember?”
It took him a moment to recall he had glimpsed it in Azeran’s journal. Dyna was searching for the Sol Medallion, a pendant made of gold with a Sunstone in the center. The stone contained the light of the sun. They needed it to obliterate the Shadow. There was a detailed illustration of it in the journal—and there had been another pendant drawn beside it.
“It’sAzeran’smedallion,” she said. “But the Moonstone is missing.”
Zev groaned and rubbed his forehead. “Let me guess. The Moonstone is also on Mount Ida?”
