The flute weighed heavy in his limp hand. He’d thought music might help, but he didn’t have the desire to play it anymore. He glanced down at the instrument, and the urge to vomit rushed up his throat at the sight of dried blood beneath his fingernails.
If he was worthless before, now he was truly nothing.
There had to be some good in this. He was no longer the person his father claimed. The throne wouldn’t be forced on him now.
“Cassiel?”
He stiffened. Dyna’s slight form passed through the foliage with her cheeks flushed from the climb. She clutched the caplet around her shoulders, breath swirling in the morning chill.
Her foot dragged as she limped over to him. “There you are.”
He turned away and sat on the edge of the cliff, not able to look at her. His promises had turned to smoke, along with the last shred of purpose he’d found. He couldn’t be what she needed anymore.
“You should not be wandering about on that ankle,” he muttered. “How did you find me?”
“I’m … not sure.”
His wings twitched. The bond led her to him as it had led him to her in Corron.
She settled beside him. “Are you all right?”
He attempted to lie, but he broke off at the concern radiating from her. How could he explain the festering inside of him? He couldn’t.
“I hear you at night,” she whispered. “The nightmares.”
He closed his eyes, not wanting to admit it to her or himself how much he wished they’d never left the inn. Lying beside her had given him one night of peaceful sleep. He’d never have that again.
“Cassiel.” Dyna placed her hand over one of his fists clenched on his lap. His skin vibrated beneath her touch. “What happened was not your fault.”
He gritted his teeth and jerked away. Hewasat fault, and he could not bear to face it while being around her.
Cassiel rose to his feet and strode away.
Dyna jumped up, following his clipped pace. “Don’t do that. Don’t take all the blame.”
“What do you know about blame?”
“I know plenty. Von would not have come after us if I had not met him. This ismyfault.”
Cassiel stopped with his back to her. “Do you not see?” he snapped. “I took human lives. Any divinity I had is gone.”
“You cannot carry the deaths of those men—”
“I will not discussthatwith you.”
“They attacked—”
“Enough!”
The hurt he caused her punched him in the gut. Cassiel didn’t mean to be so harsh, but he couldn’t speak of his deeds. They were to lie in the folds of the abominable husk of his existence.
He should apologize. So many times, he owed her one, but he wanted her to leave him alone. To go away so she wouldn’t see what she could undoubtedly feel from him.
The heavy silence dragged. Dyna’s feet shifted in the dirt behind him. He thought she’d walked away when a small pebble hit his back.
“What are you—” He ducked as another one bounced off his head. “Stop!”
“Foolish, stubborn-headed, full-of-yourself prince!” She pelted him wherever she could hit him with a handful of pebbles. “Killing them changes nothing!”
