Itwasaroughfew months, trying to find a balance between man and beast. I couldn’t blame my jaguar for wanting to help take care of our mate, but there was only so much he could do without opposable thumbs. Like cuddling! He was great at cuddling with Joel, but he didn’t see that as enough.
For my part, I performed most of the tasks my beast demanded of me—feeding and bathing Joel, rubbing his feet when they were swollen, tucking him in for naps when he was tired. And I did what I could to keep my jaguar’s attention on tasks hecouldmanage himself, like building the den. Joel and I had started taking a weekly trip to the bed-and-bath store and bought all manner of blankets and pillows. Then, we left them in a heap in the living room,only to wake up to find they’d been rearranged in the room that would become the nursery.
Things got much easier around the eight-month mark when Joel gave up dog walking and working at the club. He was simply too large and too tired to manage those jobs, but I was proud to say that we’d made sure that it was his decision in the end. He still worked part-time at the café, but I knew his boss and I were in agreement about him taking it easy, so I didn’t worry about him there—too much, anyway.
Today, though, there’d been a strange shift in the fragile peace I had with my jaguar. I couldn’t pinpoint exactly what it was, but he felt… too still, too aware. And I didn’t like it one bit.
“Why are you frowning?” Joel asked, waddling into the living room, dressed in his extra-large work shirt. He was 38 weeks pregnant, and his belly was putting the fabric of that shirt to the test.
I reached up to touch my forehead. “Am I? Sorry. My beast is just being weird today.”
Joel seemed to be bracing himself. “Weird, how? Like… trapping a badger in my sock drawer weird? Or like, adding so many blankets to the den that I turn into a fairytale prince complaining about a pea? If I have a choice, I pick the pea.”
“No, neither of those… I don’t think.” I shook my head, trying to dislodge the unease that was slowly creeping through my limbs. “Maybe he just needs to go for a run or something.” I’d been keeping him contained as much as possible because he was so unpredictable these days.
Joel blinked at me for a minute, no doubt picking up on my unease through the bond, before he said, “Right. Well. I’m gonna head to work, then, and if you could just text me later to let me know what to prepare for when I get home, that would be great.” He puckered his lips, indicating he wanted a kiss, so I stood up from the couch to provide one. If he tried to lean over to give me one, he was liable to tip straight over. He accepted my kiss, then angled my face down so he could kiss my forehead next. “Make good choices,” he said against my skin, talking to my beast.
When Joel tried to step back, though, my hand snapped out to grab his wrist. “Um… hun?” he asked in confusion, tugging on his arm.
“That wasn’t me,” I grunted. Sweat broke out on my forehead as I tried to force my hand open, but my grip only seemed to tighten. “I can’t… let… go.”
Hey! Cut it out!I tried shouting into my head, but my jaguar was decidedly ignoring me. His focus on our mate was single-minded.
“What do you mean you can’t let go?” Joel asked, his voice rising in pitch. He was understandably starting to panic.
“I mean, I can’t—” The rest of my words were lost as pain wracked through me. I hadn’t experienced such excruciating full-body pain since my first shift as a teenager. I tasted blood as my sharpened teeth punched through my gums, claws extended from fingers and toes, fur sprouting down my neck and chest. I did everything I could to keep my human form, but my jaguar refused to listen. “I c-can’t s-stop him!” I managed to get out—right before the shift tore through me.
“North!” Joel cried as my clothes split down the seams, hanging in tatters off my jaguar’s graceful form. Then he frowned down at my beast and threw his hands out, exasperated. “I thought we were past this!”
What are you doing?I raged, my thoughts a mixture of confusion and fear.Let me out!
No. Stay.
At first, I thought he meant me, but when Joel tried to stalk past us to the door, my beast blocked his path, upper lip curling to reveal our teeth in a display of dominance. It became clear that he intended on keeping Joel in the apartment.
“Cut it out,” Joel huffed. “This isn’t time to play. I need to get to work.”
But when he tried again to leave, my jaguar didn’t stop at simply getting in his way. Now I was helpless as we used our considerable weight to physically push him back. No matter how I fought, I found us nipping our teeth into the waistband of Joel’s pants and tugging him back toward the nursery—and the soft pillow den currently taking up most of the floorspace.
Joel was doing his best to wiggle free, but he was so front-heavy that his balance was off and just staying on his feet was a struggle. He pointed a finger at us. “Bad kitty,” he scolded, and I felt the words land. My jaguar didn’t like being scolded, but he was absolutely adamant that Joel couldn’t leave.
I tried again to reason with him.What the hell is going on? Is something wrong? Talk to me. Whatever is wrong, I can help.
Once Joel was in the den, my jaguar let go, then sat in the doorway, making it impossible to leave. Our mate plopped down in the middle of all the pillows and let out an angry huff. “Okay, I’m here, just like you wanted. Now what?”
But then he gasped, his hands going to his belly. “Oh.” His face went about three shades paler, and he cleared his throat. “Um, North? I just felt a contraction… Looks like I’m in labor.” He laughed shakily. “I guess that explains your cat.”
It didn’t seem to matter whether we had a reason for it or not—he still wasn’t letting me take my skin. I was entirely helpless, locked inside my mind as nothing more than a witness to my mate’s pain. As his contractions began to progress, I tried yelling, bargaining, threatening, anything to get through to my beast, but none of it worked. He was determined to keep Joel here to give birth in the den that he’d worked so hard on.
Joel, a little frantic now, knelt down in front of my jaguar. “Please, I need my phone. I promise I won’t try to leave, but I need to call someone. Can I do that?”
Thank gods, he allowed it, though we prowled behind Joel the whole time, and as soon as he had the phone, he was herded back to the den.
First, Joel called his boss and explained that he wasn’t coming in to work, and next, he called the one person we could both rely on, who just so happened to be right downstairs. “Um, hey, Mace? We have a bit of a problem… North’s stuck as a cat, I’m not allowed the leave the apartment, and I’m in labor.”
Through the line, I heard Mace say simply, “I’m on it!” Never had I been more grateful for my brother. Webickered, sure, but the love, loyalty, and trust between us was solid, and I knew that extended to my mate.
Sure enough, within the hour, Mace was at the door. The man worked fast! He was loaded down with bags of supplies, and as he barged into the apartment, he announced, “I’ve brought reinforcements!” That included Kedi, but more importantly, the midwife. We all managed to relax after that.
