Grace blanched at the compliment, feeling somehow worse than before. When she didn’t speak, Mr. Milton’s steps paused.
“Are you feeling all right, Miss Sharpe? You don’t seem yourself.”
They had met a handful of times; how would he know what her true self was like? But she didn’t say that. Instead, she shook her head.
“Indeed, I’m not feeling my best.”
“Are you ill?”
“Possibly,” she said offhandedly. Thinking of how much her heart hurt.
“Perhaps you should see a doctor.”
“Ha! Er, I mean.” She cleared her throat. “Y-yes. I suppose I should, considering I know so many.”
Mr. Milton grinned, and for a moment neither of them spoke. A creeping sense of dread began to crawl up Grace’s spine. Instinctually, she knew that Mr. Milton was about to say something and for the life of her, she couldn’t bear to hear it.
“Miss Sharpe, I’ve been meaning to ask you a question,” he said, eyes steadfast on her.
“Oh?”
“Yes. I was wondering, if you might consider allowing me to court you. I know we don’t know each other very well, but that is something I’m very willing to fix. You see, I have spent many years traveling alone, building my fortune as I go, and it’s come to my attention that it’s rather lonely at the top. That said, I find you quite charming. Your intelligence, your bravery, yourhumor. All are qualities that I find attractive and while I will not belittle you with remarks on your beauty, I must say that it is truly mesmerizing to gaze into your eyes.”
He leaned in slightly and Grace gulped, sure the feeling of dread was splattered across her face. She had been so cavalier in talking with James about Mr. Milton and her foolish experiment that she hadn’t actually realized what it would be like to be face to face with him.
“T-that is kind of you, Mr. Milton. Exceedingly so, but I’m not quite sure we are a good fit for one another.” When he didn’t speak, but instead waited patiently for her to continue, she nodded. “You see, I’m rather determined never to marry. Anyone.”
He frowned. “Really?”
“Yes. Unfortunately, I believe that my profession will not allow it and as I’m determined to have that, I cannot entertain the idea of marriage, so I’m afraid a courtship between us would be fruitless.”
“Huh,” he breathed, seemingly unprepared for her dismissal. “And here I thought we shared a mutual attraction.”
“Oh, I do find you attractive, Mr. Milton. That is, you are an attractive man, with many fine qualities and there isn’t a woman alive who wouldn’t be blessed to have you, but unfortunately for me, I’m afraid that my duty to the medical field is beyond my control. Like a priest called to serve the church, I feel I have been called on to serve the people, and marriage would hinder that.”
His brows pinched together, trying to understand, though it appeared he didn’t want to.
“It is a noble pursuit,” he finally said after a long silence. “And unfortunately, it makes me like you all the more.” He sighed. “Are you sure? I could build you your own hospital that you might be a patron of. You could help hundreds, if not thousands of people.”
She smiled sadly and placed her hand on his shoulder.
“Are you trying to bribe me?”
“Possibly. Is it working?”
She laughed and her hand fell away.
“Would you allow me to practice medicine as your wife?”
Even before he answered, she saw the truth in his face.
“If I’m to be completely honest, no. I’m searching for a companion, one who might travel with me and I fear that would interfere with your work.”
She understood and though she knew she should feel despondent about it, Grace couldn’t muster up any regret at his honest words.
“Mr. Milton, if you did build a hospital, which I think you should, I would gladly take up residence there as an employee. I’m sure it would be a grand building indeed.”
A small spark flashed in his eyes and Grace saw his attention switch.
