“You didn’t.I’m sorry.”I push the back of my head against her hand.“I shouldn’t have said that.”
“It’s okay.”Nic shifts on her side.I follow suit so we face each other.“The truth’s the truth.”
She traces a fingertip along the rim of my ear.
“I didn’t think it through again,” Nic says.“You seem to have that effect on me.”
“That’s what drug—” Nic silences me by bringing her fingertip to my lips.
“Even though I was more than happy to forget about the consequences of my actions, they didn’t just magically disappear.I know what I have to do.”Her finger falls away and she cups my cheek in her palm.“All I ask of you, for a little while longer, is that you don’t tell anyone.I know that’s difficult, but I need to get my ducks in a row.I can’t just close my practice from one day to the next.I need some time.”
“You can ask me anything.”
Nic expels a small sigh.“This includes not telling your therapist about us.”She briefly closes her eyes.“Jan will be furious when she finds out because she gave me the benefit of the doubt.She trusted me to do the right thing.And I did the complete opposite.”
“My lips are sealed.”I’d do anything to make this easier for Nic.I have nothing to lose, while she stands to lose everything.
“Is it not hard for you to keep this to yourself?All these emotions… I’m sure you want to share with your friends.To take some of the pressure off.”
“Well, I have Derek and Ben,” I blurt out, quickly realizing my mistake.God damn it.These orgasms are messing with my brain power.
“What do you mean?”Nic’s eyebrows knit together in a frown.
I tell her about running into Derek at theDeadline for Lovepremiere and him inviting me to his house.
Nic scoffs.“I can’t believe he didn’t tell me.”
“It was before I came to see you last week.”
“I trust Derek to keep our secret, but that’s hardly the point.”Nic shakes her head.“But it just goes to show how difficult it is to keep something like this hidden.”The sigh that follows is full of despair.“I don’t want that for us.”
“What do you want for us?”My heart leaps all the way into my throat.
“I just want… a normal start to… what could be something.”She swallows hard.“I’m sorry that I will never be able to give that to you.”
“What’s normal, anyway?”I scoot a little closer.Is this Nic telling me she wants to keep seeing me?
“Certainly not this.”Even with her face all torn between how she—clearly—feels about me and doing what’s right according to the ethics board, Nic looks absolutely scrumptious.“The problem is…” Nic’s hand drifts along my back to my behind.“That I don’t seem to give a fuck.”She cups my cheek in her hand.
Her hand on my ass is tender and possessive all at once.It makes me want to never move from this bed.Mostly, it makes me realize how much I already crave every single touch from her.
Chapter26
Nic
How am I waking up next to Avery Hall again?But I just have to look at her sleeping form to know—to feel it in every fiber of my being.Sometimes, the choices we make—no matter how life-changing and huge—are not conscious ones.They’re made on a whim, like my decision last night.Although I can hardly still call this a whim.It’s so much more than that.
It’s the way she disarms me with a joke when I’m about to get too serious.It’s how she walked into this whole thing without flinching.And it’s the simple, devastating truth that I’d rather risk everything than miss out on this fire between us.
Of course, Avery is movie-star gorgeous.But it’s the unguarded version of her—her mouth full of f-bombs and a swagger that could never be scripted—that floors me the most.She may be a movie star to the world, yet to me she’s the woman I’ve fallen for insanely hard.
Avery’s lashes flutter and then she blinks at me, a slow smile curving her lips as if she can’t quite believe I’m actually here.
“Hey,” she says, her voice deliciously rough with sleep.
I brush my thumb across her cheek, unable to stop myself, and for a moment it feels like we’re the only two people in the world.If only we were.
She shifts closer, tucking herself against me as if it’s the most natural thing in the world.Her warmth seeps into me and I can’t remember the last time I felt so at ease in someone’s arms.
