Deena recalled Austin kissing her, his touch both gentle and insistent, and the way he gazed at her as she lay before him.
Did he protect me then?
Before she could respond, the door opened, and Selina entered with an army of helpers. Their arms were full of white silk and lace.
She stopped when she saw Deena’s face. “Oh, darling.”
Deena tried to smile but failed.
Selina turned to her group of followers. “Go set the gown, veil, and jewelry carefully in her chambers.” She commanded them, and they dispersed immediately. “Come with me, Dee. Let’s look at your wedding gown in your room. Just the two of us.”
Deena glanced at Dominic.
He gave her a small, sad smile. “Go on. I’ll be here.”
She walked unsteadily and followed Selina, who spoke about her shopping experience.
Selina was used to making and sending dresses to Paris for Deena, without her being present at the boutique, so the dowager left her in charge of Deena’s wedding gown as well. Deena was sure that the dress would be perfect, but the corridor to her chamber felt endless, and so did her troubled thoughts.
“Deena, this does not have to be an unhappy occasion. Austin cares for you…I see it, and Dominic sees it too, or he would never have agreed to this. Do not forget the friendship you two built during this time.” Selina looked at her with a gentle smile.
Deena nodded at her and blinked back the tears that threatened to fall. When they had entered her chamber, the gown lay across the bed like an offering. It was a simple ivory dress. High-waisted, flowing silks, and delicate lace at the neckline and sleeves.
“It’s beautiful,” Deena whispered despite herself.
Selina touched her shoulder. “It will look even more beautiful on you.”
But Deena stared at the dress and felt conflicted. “I don’t deserve this.”
“Stop that. You deserve every good thing.” Selina turned her gently. “And Austin… he’s not doing this out of pity.”
Deena scoffed. “Then why is he marrying me, Selina?”
“He’s marrying to save you,” Selina said softly. “And that could only mean that he cares about you.”
Deena’s eyes filled, but she did not believe that the Velvet Duke cared about her or anyone. He wanted her, yes. She wanted him too, but caring and love was not on offer. Doubt entered her mind as she questioned their untimely wedding that was quickly approaching.
“What if he changes his mind, Selina? What if he wakes up in a month and remembers who I really am? The girl who was caught in a library. The girl who helped hide a pregnancy in a convent. The girl who?—”
“The girl who is brave,” Selina interrupted gently. “The girl who is loyal. The girl who is kind even when the world hasn’t been kind to her.”
Deena shook her head. “I’m a burden.”
“You’re not.” Selina took her hands. “You’re a gift. To Dominic. To Percy. To Mary. And, if you let him, you could be a gift to Austin, too.”
Deena stared at the wedding dress again.
She thought of their kiss in the meadow where it all began. The way he’d looked at her after, dazed, almost reverent, like she was something miraculous. She thought of the blackmailer’s note and Penelope, alone and terrified wherever she may be. Shethought of Dominic’s sad smile downstairs and the stranger who was lurking everywhere, ever ready to hurt her and her family. Tears threatened to fall, and she struggled to keep them back.
“I don’t know how to do this,” she whispered.
Selina grabbed her hand. “You don’t have to know. You just have to try.”
Deena clung to her.
“I know you’re scared,” Selina murmured. “I am too, but we have to be strong for ourselves and for each other.”
Deena closed her eyes, doubt continued to fill her, but she couldn’t speak of it. She didn’t want to disappoint her family anymore.
