I squeezed my eyes shut for a moment. When I opened them again, Tessa had moved close enough to hold the brochure out to me.
“They even updated the brochures with a photo.”
Taking the brochure from her, I glanced down at a picture of the plaque that I had not requested. “She deserves to be remembered like this.”
She wrapped her arms around her stomach. “When I asked the office manager, she said they wanted to do something to properly honor the large donation made in my mother’s name. Since it had been done anonymously and they couldn’t thank the person behind it.”
There was no point denying the obvious. “It was me.”
She took a step back, her eyes blinking rapidly. “Why anonymously?”
“Because you were never supposed to know.” I forced myself to stay still, my every instinct screaming to close the distance between us. “It wasn’t meant to be a gesture you’d owe me for. I just wanted to honor her. And help the place that meant so much to you.”
She looked down at the brochure and shook her head. “I was almost positive this was you, but I don’t even know how to feel after hearing you confirm it.”
“That makes sense, considering how complex our situation is.” Searching for the right thing to say, I thought about what my therapist had taught me about holding space for opposingfeelings. “Being pissed at me over what happened and also grateful about the donation aren’t mutually exclusive. This is new information for you, and it makes sense that you’re still trying to process it.”
Her eyes narrowed. “Who are you and what have you done with Gage?”
“You have Susan to thank for the new and improved me.” I jerked my chin toward the door with a laugh. “When I told her what Vanessa did, she told me to get my ass into therapy before I made everything worse.”
“Does your therapist know about all the things you’re doing behind the scenes in my life?” She raised her hand to tick each item on her list with a finger. “The elevator at my building, community center, and this?”
I shook my head with a grimace. “No, we hadn’t gotten that far yet, but I’ll be sure to bring it up at my appointment tomorrow.”
“I don’t know what to do with any of this.”
“Neither do I,” I admitted. “None of this was about being seen or thanked. I’m not trying to buy forgiveness. Or push you into anything you’re not ready for. I was just trying to do right by you. Finally.”
Cautious hope flickered in her hazel eyes before her lashes lowered. “But why?”
“Because I fucked up three years ago, and you paid the price for it more than me.” I raked my fingers through my hair. “And even though I let myself get manipulated by Vanessa, I still spent every single day missing you. Now that I know the truth, I had to try to repair some of the damage I caused.”
Her eyes lifted to mine again, shiny with tears that didn’t fall. “You didn’t abandon me on purpose, but you did it all the same. How can I possibly know you never will again?”
The question hurt, but it was fair. “You can’t. I’m not sure I would forgive me either, if I were you.”
Her breath caught at my confession.
“But I will never make the same mistake again,” I added. “That’s not a promise I’m making lightly. It’s one I’m learning how to keep.”
She studied me for a moment before finally asking, “Is therapy helping?”
I nodded. “Yeah. More than I thought it would.”
“How often are you going?”
“Twice a week.” I shifted my weight, uncomfortable saying any of this out loud. But Tessa deserved answers to any questions she wanted to ask. “We’re moving toward weekly sessions now that I’m actually starting to make progress.”
“What kind of progress?”
I held her gaze as I replied, “I’m learning to be more open with the people who matter. How to set boundaries so I don’t let myself get pressured into decisions that aren’t good for me. And admitting that therapy has been good for me, despite why it started.”
Tessa’s eyes continued to search mine when a soft knock interrupted us. The door cracked open, and Susan’s head appeared, her expression far too innocent for my comfort. “Gage? Weren’t you running out to get me lunch from that place down the street?”
“The place down the street?” I echoed, my brows drawing together.
She batted her lashes and leaned farther into my office. “I cannot believe you forgot your promise to me.”
