“I hope you have a nice night.” It was the safest thing I could say when every instinct in me was begging to stay.
Turning and walking away was one of the hardest things I’d ever done. But as she shut and locked the door behind me, I reminded myself that at least the groveling had begun. I’d made one small step in the right direction and only had about a thousand more to go.
9
TESSA
After locking the door, I held myself together until Gage’s car disappeared down the street. Only then did I look down at the scarf in my hands.
My fingers trembled so badly I almost dropped it. I never thought I’d have this part of my mom back again. I couldn’t believe he’d kept it for so long.
I pressed the cashmere to my face, breathing in a faint hint of lavender that shouldn’t have still been there. Fabric didn’t hold scents for that long, but grief could be tricky.
I was halfway to my office when I couldn’t hold my sob back any longer. Dropping to my knees right there in the hallway, I clutched my mom’s scarf like it was the only thing holding me together while I cried.
Hot tears soaked into the soft material as I let out everything I’d been holding inside. My tears weren’t just from the relief of getting this treasured memento back. The fabric now carried two ghosts—the mother who I’d lost forever and the man who I’d spent three years trying to forget.
I cried until my side hurt, and nothing was left inside me except exhaustion. As grateful as I was to have the scarf back, hisgesture ripped open every crack I’d tried to bury under layers of buttercream for the past three years.
My mom would’ve known exactly what to say to make me feel better, and it hurt so much that I couldn't call her. So I did the only thing I could.
On shaky legs, I pulled out my phone and called my dad as I walked into my office.
He answered on the second ring. “Hey, sweetheart. How’re you doing?”
Just hearing his voice made my eyes burn all over again.
“Hi, Dad,” I managed.
He might’ve been twelve hundred miles away, but there was no missing how my voice cracked. “What’s wrong?”
I dropped onto my chair. “I’m okay. I just had something unexpected happen tonight.”
“Tell me.” I’d heard that tone plenty of times growing up, and it left no room for evasion.
I drew in a shaky breath. “Remember that cashmere scarf of Mom’s?”
“The one that rat bastard never returned to you?”
“Yeah.” I winced as I realized this conversation was going to be tougher than I expected. We hadn’t talked about Gage in a couple of years, so I hadn’t really thought about how his anger had probably not disappeared during that time. “He brought it back to me tonight.”
His breath caught. “Oh, honey.”
“I know I’m imagining it, but I could almost swear it still smells like her.” I buried my face in the cashmere again for another whiff.
“If it brings her closer to you, that’s real enough.”
“Yeah,” I whispered.
“I hate that you had to see him, but I’m glad you finally have it back. Your mom loved that scarf. She’d be happy you’re holding it again.”
A tear slid down my cheek, and neither of us spoke for a moment. I could hear waves in the background and idly wondered what the weather was like in Florida. He’d moved five years ago after losing Mom because he couldn’t stand being surrounded by memories. I’d almost gone with him, but I’d just started a new job. Only a few months later, I met Gage and quickly started to fall for him.
Dad cleared his throat. “Are you alone?”
“Yeah, I’m at the bakery, and everyone else has left for the day.”
“Do you want company?”
