She begins gliding her nimble fingers on the keys and of course, just like everything else, she's a natural at this too. I should be looking at her hands, but I'm not; I'm staring at her stunning face, which looks so captivated as she plays.
I feel my heart beating and my ears ringing, but I'm not sure if that's because of the music or if it's her.
I've seen Adaline focused before, but I've never seen her like this; so free, so relaxed, and joyful. I've never seen her actually let go and it's thrilling; it's exhilarating.
I didn't think it was possible for her to be more attractive than she already is, I mean, that would be unfair to the whole population.
Yet here she is, looking even more beautiful because excitement is scribbled all over her face.
“This is so cool,” she mumbles under her breath like a child and an ache form in my chest.
She should have been able to do this. She should have had the opportunity to do everything she desired; every kid should be able to.
Yet she didn't have that, she had to work, study, and live; all without parents, all while I constantly berated her and beat her down.
Stop it. Stop feeling guilty. She's just your sex buddy, nothing more, nothing less.
She stops playing and looks up at me, snapping me out of my thoughts. “Your turn.” She smiles softly and I almost combust.
I clear my throat and nod, my hands moving back to the piano as I avoid her gaze. I feel myself becoming immersed in the music and it's starting to tug at me.
“Why did you pick this song?” she asks me softly, almost in a whisper.
My hands still for a moment, but I don't turn to her. I'm not sure what it is about Adaline Emery, but for some reason I want to tell her things, things so deeply embedded in my soul that I don't even want to tell myself.
“I used to play it all the time, especially during my mother’s birthdays. She always asked me to play after we cut her cake; she used to love it,” I say very softly, almost in a whisper.
Mentioning my mother out loud makes my heart drop. I can't help it; I haven't mentioned her to Adaline in a while and it was very intentional.
I kissed a girl, I let her go down on me. If my mother ever found out, she would…hate me. I would be just like my father—a pervert, a degenerate, someone capable of hurting—
“I don't think she could stop loving it; I don't see how anyone could.” Adaline cuts off my thoughts and I turn to look at her.
I've never heard or seen her speak so softly before. She means what she just said; at least I hope she does.
Her eyebrows are furrowed gently and her green eyes hold an indescribable emotion, but I know it's not annoyance or hate—I know very well what those look like on her.
Her eyes and her words wash a calm over me and instantly, I feel my hysteria melt away. It's okay, my mother would never find out about this. This is just experimenting anyway, I could never be like my father, I would never hurt my mother like him.
I wouldn't. I promise I won't. What my mother doesn't know won't hurt her.
“Ever since my father left, she just…stopped asking me to play,” I say with a sigh. I sound so pathetic complaining about my mother to someone who has no parents.
“Maybe she doesn't have to ask, maybe you should play it anyway.”
I want to yell and shout at her for being so soft and sweet for no reason, but I don't. instead, I lean forward and envelop her lips with my own…once again.
She kisses me back instantly, like it's second nature. The thought itself spurs me on. The kiss is gentle and serene, like she's telling me she understands, just by using her soft lips.
Girls have such soft lips; in fact, everything they have is soft and it's…comforting.
She withdraws from my mouth and rests her forehead against mine. “This is actually a pretty good celebration,” she says with a smile.
Her smile feels like a poison dart stabbing my chest; it's too genuine. I can't do this; we're treading into dangerous waters and I can't take it.
I have so many feelings swirling in my chest right now, but I'm only gonna focus on one—desire.
“This isn't the only celebration,” I tell her huskily moving my lips to her neck.
