“What makes you think I want something?” She shoots back, smirking lazily at me.
You always want something.
“Maybe because you can never seem to leave me alone.”
Never. For the last five years she has never left me alone and I really hate her. I hate her for it because now I've gotten used to it.
Now, it's one of the things that feels normal, like I can't function without it.
She shakes her head and stalks towards me. “Aren't you bored of being alone? Since you've been like that most of your life?”
That has to be a dig at my parents being dead and the fact that my brother was in prison for most of my adolescent life. She's treading into very dangerous territory.
“Why are you here, Juliette?” I repeat in an annoyed tone. “For an apology?”
I would rather sit on a cactus, naked, while simultaneously getting kicked in the face before I ever apologize to Juliette.
She laughs venomously. “Why would I need an apology? Nothing you said was true, so it didn't bother me in any way.”
She's getting closer to me and I'm starting to feel my breathing getting shallow. She's different today, her eyes seem more cruel and her overall demeanour is harder to read than usual.
“If that's what helps you sleep at night,” I say with a scoff.
“You said I was unlovable—”
“Juliette—” I try to cut her off and try to justify how mean I was to her.
While it was warranted, the words I used were cruel and she has just reminded me of it. I can practically feel the guilt gnawing at my chest.
She cuts me off and continues. “That's clearly a lie. I'm very lovable, considering I have my boyfriend and my mother, while you have neither. So, I guess that makesyouthe unlovable one, right?”
Scratch that. Any shred of guilt I've had for her has just dissipated into thin air. Bringing up my mother? She has never done that before, nor has she ever brought up my father.
The latter wouldn't have affected me as much, not the way my mother affects me. It burns at my chest and coils at my throat. How dare she bring her up? All because of a little quarrel we had yesterday, thatshestarted?!
“I don't need either. I don't need validation from other people like you do!” I raise my voice, getting into her face.
“No, you don't,” she crosses her arms, “you just get your validation from your grades.”
God,her scent, her eyes, the way her body feels like it's pulling me in magnetically at every breath I take, it's so infuriating.
She's on a roll today, her emotions are so guarded that I can see a glimpse of myself in her. Had I really aggravated her that much yesterday? Why is she so bothered about it?
“Yes, I do, because grades actually mean something.”
Grades will get me where I need to go, I don't need a mother, girlfriend, boyfriend or basically anyone for that. That shit is futile, considering what my long-term goal is.
“Maybe for you. All I need to do is wave my money around and I can get into any university of my choice.” She's goading me, biting her lip and aggravating me with her spoiled nature.
She's right. I know deep down that I can work twice as hard as them, but I will never get the same opportunities. Rich kids will always have their cake and get to eat it too.
“You should use all that money to buy yourself a new personality. You're in dire need of one,” I deflect in a bored tone.
It's cracking. Slowly, but surely, my unbothered façade is cracking and I can feel the splinters in my body and the rage in my mind. I avoid her gaze because it's driving me to the brink of madness and I don't wantherto see my mask slipping.
“Get on your knees.” Her tone is what makes my eyes snap back toward her. It's low. Husky. Her eyes are devoid of any emotion and that cheeky smile is still on her lips.
Is she crazy? What goes on in her mind for her to come out with the most random orders?
