“My brother lost himself fighting for our country,” he said. “I lost the ability to play an instrument. How is it fair for me to blame him…especially when he didn’t do it on purpose?”
“Even if your brother did not intend to hurt you, don’t you dare minimize what happened,” Jane said fervidly. “Playing music is not a trivial matter. To an artist, making art iseverything.”
Her understanding smashed through some inner dam, and the truth burst from him.
“I cannot be angry at Owen,” he said roughly. “But I cannotnotbe angry at him either.”
The conundrum had eaten at him for the last three years. Even now, he saw no solution. No way to reconcile his love and rage toward his sibling.
Jane sighed. Then she shrugged. “Family is complicated,” she said with feeling.
He stared at her.
“Why are you looking at me in that fashion?” She returned his gaze like an inquisitive doe. “Am I wrong?”
She wasn’t. In three words, she’d summed up the problem that had consumed him for years—that had turned him into a brooding, grumpy bounder because he’d felt no one could understand his experience. But somehowshedid, and her empathy made him feel almost…normal.
The rumble started deep inside him. It traveled from his gut to his chest and up his throat, emerging as a shout of laughter. He couldn’t stop, the guffaws coming out of him until tears ran from his eyes. Jane went from looking puzzled to giggling, and then she was laughing too. She looked so sweet and adorable that he couldn’t resist kissing her.
She kissed him back.
He clenched his hand in her hair, tilting her head back so he could ravage her as he wished. She whimpered, pulling him closer, parting her lips for him like the wanton girl she was. He thrust his tongue inside her, and she let him, moaning into his mouth. When she sucked on his tongue, he went hard as a rock.
He pushed her back onto the sofa, his hand going up her skirts. Her stockinged legs were enticingly curvy, and when he touched the slit in her drawers, he groaned aloud.
“You’re drenched,” he rasped.
She bit her lip. “I want you.”
Her honesty unraveled him. Burgeoned him with pride and desire.
“Devil and damn, how I want you, Jane.”
He kissed her, lingering when she sighed. He couldn’t help fingering her a little, marveling at her passionate response to him. She was slippery and hot, her moans making his cock throb with anticipation. By Jove, he wanted to make love to her.
But…he couldn’t.
Not until they had settled some things.
Inhaling for control, he lowered her skirts and pulled her into a sitting position. His fingers glistened with her dew. Despite his own advanced state of arousal, he hid a smile at how dazed she looked.
“If we are to move forward, there are matters we must discuss.” He tucked a stray curl behind her ear. “You are in my employ, and I will not take advantage of you, Jane.”
“I know you won’t. I make my own decisions, and I want this as much as you,” she said earnestly. “I am fully aware that our affair will not come with commitments: anything that happens between us will be temporary, with no strings attached.”
Even though he’d been about to propose a casual liaison, her reply annoyed him.
“Why do you assume that?” he asked.
“You’re a peer, and I’m a housekeeper.” She shrugged. “We come from different worlds.”
“I don’t give a damn about that.”
“Not when it comes to a temporary affair, perhaps. But for a permanent relationship?”
She lifted her brows knowingly, and he felt…trapped. He hadn’t been thinking about marriage. But not for the reason she supposed. Having recently been jilted, he wasn’t considering matrimony again…with anyone. As he was trying to figure out an explanation that didn’t expose his mortifying rejection, Jane chuckled.
“Rest easy, my lord,” she said. “I’m not about to spring the parson’s mousetrap on you. I have no interest in marriage.”
