“Trying to call my bluff, are you?” The bawd gave her a cold look. “Well, it won’t work, dearie. If you don’t put on that bloody nun’s costume right now and satisfy the patrons I’ve lined up for you, Iwilltell his lordship everything.”
“It won’t matter.” In that instant, Xenia made her choice—the choice she would have made sooner if fear hadn’t held her back. “BecauseIam going to tell him everything.”
The instant she said the words, she felt the chains fall from her. Amazed, she realized that she’d held the key all this time. Freedom wasn’t about getting away from her past but facing it.
“Please.” The Abbess scoffed. “Only a fool would give up that golden goose, and you strike me as a female who’s learned to live by her wits, Miss Wardell.”
“He’s not a golden goose to me. I love him,” she said ardently. “He deserves to know the truth. I should have told him earlier, but I was trying to protect him.”
“Protectyourself, you mean. From being tossed out on your arse.”
“It’s true that, at first, I didn’t tell him I was Lady Jo’s daughter because I needed the job and a place to stay. But once I got to know him, I didn’t tell him about my mama because I knew he would try to protect me from her. I could not stand for him to be hurt because of me.”
“No man will protect you once he knows you’re a criminal and a whore,” the Abbess sneered.
“He will.” She spoke with confidence because she knew her beloved—his character and sense of honor. “After I explain everything and beg his forgiveness, he will stand by me because that is the kind of gentleman he is. That is why I love him.”
Even though her knees were shaking, she headed to the door, her head held high.
“I made you, and I can unmake you,” the Abbess fumed. “I’m going to report you to the Peelers. See how you like rotting behind bars, you ungrateful bitch?—”
“I would reconsider that decision if I were you.”
At the familiar male voice, Xenia whirled around. Her heart hurtled into her chest at the sight of Ethan standing on the other side of the curtain. Had he been in the room this entire time…hiding behind the sofa? He tore the material out of his way with a savage motion; without that barrier, she saw the full extent of his fury. His eyes blazed in the holes of his mask, incinerating her confidence. The enormity of her mistake struck her.
She’d trusted that love would shelter her…but she didn’t know the extent of Ethan’s feelings for her. They’d never exchanged words of love, even if she’d felt them in her heart. If he didn’t love her, how could she expect him to take on the daughter of a notorious criminal, a woman who’d survived by performing in brothels, who’d been lying to him all along? It was asking a lot even if hedidlove her.
She had deceived him, just as his fiancée had. Though she hadn’t betrayed him with another man, she’d done so with a ghost. The ghost of her past. Although Xenia had been knocked down time and again, she’d never felt defeated. Until now. When she saw the disgust and revulsion on the face of the man she loved and knew she deserved it.
ChapterThirty-Four
Emotions roiled in Ethan, and he went with rage.
He faced the Abbess, letting her see the full extent of his wrath. “If you speak about my housekeeper to anyone, I will ruin you,” he vowed.
“Please, my lord.” The Abbess’s voice held a tremor. “You, er, misunderstood.”
Like any bully, she was weak, cowed by a show of greater strength. She was the opposite of Xenia, who’d had her power stripped from her time and again yet still stood up for what she believed in. Who was staring at him, her eyes wide with fear and trepidation…
I’ll deal with her later. First I must ensure the bawd’s silence.
“If her connection to Joanna Wardell becomes public, I will make it my personal mission to destroy you,” he said. “Those wealthy patrons you’re after are my peers. All it takes is a few words at one of the gentlemen’s clubs: about how indiscreetly you run your business and how unclean your whores are. No one of any consequence will patronize your establishment again.”
“Have mercy, my lord,” the bawd said plaintively. “Upon my mother’s grave, I would never do anything to endanger Mrs. Wood. In fact, if anyone asks, I will say I don’t know her.”
“You had better.” His gaze told her he meant it. “Now get out and lock the door behind you.”
“Yes, my lord.”
The bawd slithered out, leaving him alone with Xenia. The latter looked as if she were having difficulty breathing. He went up to her and yanked off her mask before removing his own.
“Now I see you clearly,” he said coldly.
“I…I can explain,” she said.
Her expression was anxious and uncertain, yet it was the desperate hope in her eyes that punched him in the gut.
“You’ve said that before,” he bit out.
