“How did you? Win him over, I mean?” Penny said.
“By forgiving myself. In truth, Ambrose helped me to realize that we all make mistakes, and, most importantly,”—Marianne’s eyes held hers—“true love forgives.”
The words struck tinder, a painful flare within Penny’s chest. It took her a moment to recognize what she was feeling. The emotion was so at odds with her guilt and remorse that she hadn’t paid it any mind. But the smoldering ember was there, hadbeenthere for days if she was honest, and it was one of… resentment.
True, she’d wronged Marcus and broken his trust. She deserved his anger… and yet didn’t she also deserve at least achanceto make amends? He’d vowed that they would never go to bed angry with one another, yet for six weeks now, she’d endured his wrath and, worse yet, sleepless nights in a cold and lonely bed. He wouldn’t listen to her, shut her out completely, and when she’d made that desperate attempt to connect with him, he’d dismissed her… like a whore.
Because that’s what you are. And he doesn’t even know the ugliest part of it. Imagine how he’d despise you if he knew the full truth…
Her hands balled in her lap, a vise of shame digging into her heart. She couldn't share these dark thoughts with friends—or with anyone, except for Flora. So, with skill borne out of practice, she pushed them into a mental box and locked them away until such time as she knew what to do with them. Which might prove to be never.
For the time being, she had to soldier on. Focus on her plan. Showing Marcus that she was truly contrite and that she could be a wife worthy of him were her only hopes of winning him back.
“I appreciate your concern.” Her gaze included all of her guests. “Truly, I am grateful for your visit, but I think it best to persevere with my plan. I’ll continue trying to please my husband, and that includes putting on the biggest crush thetonhas ever seen.”
Steeling herself against astute glances, Penny held her smile in place.
After a moment, Marianne said quietly, “Then you must let us know how we may assist with the ball preparations.”
Relief trickled through her that her friends wouldn’t push her on the issue.
“I haven’t even made the guest list yet,” she admitted.
“If you have a pen and parchment handy, I could jot down a list,” Emma volunteered. “Between all of us, we ought to know who’s in Town.”
“We could make a list of anything else you need too,” Thea added.
Penny could think of a few things.
My husband’s forgiveness.
His love.
The marriage I once had.
“Thank you. That sounds lovely,” she said and smiled to hide her aching heart.
Chapter Twelve
As the carriage rolled to a stop in front of their townhouse, Marcus’ youngest son, indigo eyes wide and tone wheedling said, “Please Papa, can’t we go for a walk in the square before supper?”
“We’re already dressed for the snow, and it’s the warmest it has been all week.” His middle child took up the cause. “What would ten minutes hurt?”
Not to be bested, his eldest quoted, “Walking is man’s best medicine.”
When the rascals joined forces, they were a force to be reckoned with.
Stifling a smile, Marcus said, “Who am I to argue with Hippocrates? As long as your mama agrees.”
The last words emerged from him automatically, without conscious consideration. It was a habit borne from over a decade of parenting three high-spirited boys with his wife. As it was too late to take the words back, he raised a brow at her.
Sitting on the opposite bench with their youngest, Pandora stared at him, her sooty lashes fluttering. Uncertainty flitted through her eyes, making his gut twist… with shame.
Of late, he’d been a bastard to her, and he knew it. He just didn’t know how to stop. How to stem the jealous rage that roared over him at the thought of her betrayal… of her being with other men. Even now, his muscles bunched instinctively, and he had to barricade his fury.
She looked to their children, saying firmly, “No more than ten minutes.” She adjusted the collar of Owen’s coat and pulled his knitted cap down tightly over his dark curls. “Be sure to keep your scarves and gloves on and watch for the icy patches.”
“Yes, Mama,” the boys chorused.
