“Sure. Back to the sex toy lessons. But to get a baseline…you told me you don’t have any experience with all this stuff. Tell me about that.”
It was a teacherly instruction, not a question. Carefully crafted so he had no choice but to respond.
“I was in a long-term relationship. I met a girl the first day of college, fell head over heels, and then we entered a very vanilla relationship. I’ve never been particularly adventurous. I mean, I have fantasies just like the next guy, but she wasn’t super open to them. I wanted to please my partner, whatever she wanted, and what she wanted was to touch herself while we had sex. Oral wasn’t her thing. She didn’t really like me touching her. And since she never brought them up, I never saw the point of trying out sex toys.”
“Never saw the point?” I asked, my voice pitching up in surprise.
“Not really, no. We had good sex. We both got off regularly together. When that relationship ended, I had a few hookups, but believe it or not, none of them carried vibrators around in their purses, so I never had the chance to try it with anyone else.”
My first reaction? Icarry sex toys in my purse; I’m not an animal.
My second reaction?Oh right. That’s not normal. You’re the weird one in this scenario.
My third…
“Why’d you break up?”
“We were in business together and we had a big fight about the company. Fundamental differences of opinion regarding our direction. One day, she just…decided she didn’t like me enough anymore to keep me around. Not in the office and not by her side.”
A million more questions entered my mind. The first thought to bubble to the surface, though, was:
“Her loss.”
“Back to the topic at hand,” he said, carefully avoiding any follow-ups. “Toys always seemed to be for women to use on their own. I’m not a big porn guy, but the stuff I did watch never had women use them. It just didn’t seem to be for me.”
A stitch of anger made its way to the center of my chest. It reminded me of high school, that agitated pain that occurred when you’d eaten your weight at Taco Tuesday right before the Presidential Physical Fitness Test.
“Oh, Hudson. We’ve got so much work to do.”
“Sorry to disappoint.”
“You’renot disappointing. The education on this issue is…” I said. I had a habit of pacing when I was frustrated, and now was no different. Rising from my chair, I marched back and forth along the elegant carpet. “The fact that you, a sexually active man, don’t understand the importance of this technology is sad. Mr. Ose was right, BuzzCorpisproudly women-led, but is that our fault, or is it the fault of society for teaching men that they don’t need to concern themselves with female pleasure?”
To his credit, Hudson let the rant continue.
“Orgasms are good for us. They improve our mental andphysical health, just like exercise—and more than that, they’re just plain fun. People should be using every tool at their disposal to have more of them, and at BuzzCorp, that’s what we do. We create things that give everyone, regardless of gender or identity or sex organs or relationship status, agency and autonomy over their own bodies and sex lives. Making our partners feel good, makingourselvesfeel good, should be a fundamental right. Toys like ours ensure that people reserve that right and enjoy it without shame or hesitation.”
“You’re proud of the work you do here” came his surprised reply.
“Yes,” I said. “I know I’m not building rockets anymore, but when you hear stories from people—our focus groups areveryvocal. I hear stories about women having their first orgasms at forty with our toys. Couples who have rescued themselves from dead bed. People who discover their sexualities, who allow themselves to explore their autonomy after leaving religious sects…all of it means that when I go to work every day, I’m making a difference to someone out there.”
Oh God. It was too sappy. Too impassioned. I needed to get off this topic before I weirded him out with my intensity.
“And tonight,” I said, turning my attention back to him. My mind conjured up fantasies of what lay before us. “I think I’m going to make a difference in yours.”
“Oh yeah?”
“Mm-hmm. Your future girlfriends aresogoing to thank me.”
A shadow flickered across his face. I couldn’t quite read it, because he recovered too quickly.
“So, talk me through this display.”
Yes, yes. The lessons.
“I actually have a PowerPoint.”
“Of course you do, you beautiful nerd.”
