He wasn’t sure if what he felt for her was love, but it sure as hell was destroying him.
twenty-one
THREE MONTHS AFTER COLORADO
GRAY
Ciar’s pubwas ready to open its doors. The staff was trained, the kitchen was fully staffed, and the provisions for opening week were purchased. Liquor bottles shone, and the stunning chandeliers that Bébhinn insisted would be perfect, sparkled.
Weeks ago, O’Connor Hospitality had sent out numerous coveted invitations for the pub’s grand opening, where Dublin’s elite would be treated to the best of the best.
Special menus, rare wines, old whiskeys, and high-stakes poker were some of the treats guests could expect. Gray’s family’s business specialized in not only opening a business but doing it with smashing success, and this opening was going to be one that the O’Connors could be proud of.
If only Gray could find a modicum of joy in a job well done. Instead, she went to bed each night with a ferocious headache and woke with pounding temples and swollen eyes.
The latter was likely caused by her never-ending tears. She’d believed that time and distance would cure her broken heart. Ithad been two months since she’d seen or spoken to Ciar—three months since he’d begun to pull away.
She wished they’d never kissed in his kitchen that first time. She wished they’d never been anything other than friends…better to have never known.
His father had been kind during their update meetings. He never broached the subject of his son, but from his sad eyes and worried frowns, Gray could tell he was well aware that his son had walked away from their relationship.
She’d thought about the why of it all thousands of times, finally landing on a girlfriend. Perhaps they had been broken up when he hooked up with Gray, she’d give him that much at least, but no matter his status in Colorado, it changed the moment he took that first trip back to London.
The worst, above having her love thrown aside as though it meant nothing, was that he never looked back besides a few half-hearted apologies. He never spoke to her again, not even a text to say it was over or that he was sorry. There had been…nothing.
Silence and complete rejection.
Her friends and her mother had been breathing down her neck for weeks about what had happened between her and Ciar.
She couldn’t tell them since she was in the dark as much as they were. Welcome to the Cold-Blooded Bastard’s Club—Gray wasn’t the founder, but she certainly was a VIP member. She’d finally relented and let those closest to her know that she and Ciar had broken up, but that she wasn’t prepared to speak about that yet.
She’d hated not confiding in her mother, but she’d needed the time to reflect on her own thoughts. Her mom and friends would mean well, but she didn’t need any voices in her head besides her own, and even her voice sucked to listen to.
The wallowing had to end. She couldn’t continue the self-pitying journey she’d been rocking. It took realizing that the onlyway to survive her heart’s wounds was to own that she allowed herself to stand in the conflagration’s epicenter, and the only one who could walk out of it was herself.
She was intelligent, kind, loyal, a good friend, and great at her job. Ciar might have changed her—he had changed her—but he wouldn’t break her. Thinking those words was empowering.
Her job for Ciar Murphy was done and dusted. The media outlets had been tipped off about the opening, and hints of a few bigwigs attending were dropped. Her mom had kindly sent two O’Connor employees, Jess and Derek, to work the event and make sure it was a success.
Because he would be there. Millionaire Broker Heartthrob, Ciar Murphy.
The opening was tomorrow night. She planned to visit her folks, stay well away from Dublin, and stay off social media. She didn’t want to read or see anything about it. Jess and Derek would give her and her mom the rundown after.
The thought of seeing the name of that damn pub—a name that she’d only learned before the invitations went out—splashed all over the internet had her grinding her poor teeth.
Gray Eyes. Why would he name his passion project after her? It had to be a play on her name and the color of her eyes. There had been plenty of time over the past few months to have changed it.
It felt like he ended up thinking the name was cool, and since she didn’t mean shit to him, he decided to keep it. No matter how it would make her feel.
The logo for the menus, napkins, coasters, and all other paraphernalia was a black and white drawing of two large eyes, with the iris shaded gray.
As if he hadn’t stabbed her hemorrhaging body repeatedly for months, keeping her weak and confused, he pulled that kind of bullshit.
Her mother had seen the mockup of the name and logo and clenched her jaw, thankfully not saying anything.
Now here she was, about to sneak out of town with more than a weekend bag packed. She’d asked for the Zurich job and got it. Her grandmother, Mary O’Connor, helped start what had become one of the most sought-after spas in Switzerland, and the owners were adding on.
Gray scheduled schoolwork and exams to be done online for the next month.
