Gray was right, it shouldn’t have happened that night. But in my inebriated state, every one of my insecurities had vanished, along with my sense of decency, and I’d been the one to subtly push and push and push until he’d caved.
But when he had? He’d been so tender with me. So gentle. Taking so much care, even after a night of who knew how many drinks.
I should’ve known he would be...and yet, I’dhatedhim the next morning for thinking he’d been so careless with me.
I swallowed thickly as I glanced at the couch we’d fallen asleep on the night before. The couch where he’d kissed me tenderly and passionately. Where he’d held me close, as if he’d been afraid of what would happen come morning. Where I’d hurt him by revealing what I’d known all along, and he’d somehow still offered me whatever I’d needed—even space.
Reaching for the ring tucked under my shirt, I gripped it tightly in my fist as those earlier worries flared, burning even brighter as another one slipped in.
When will he realize I’ve never deserved him?
Gray’s arms curled around my waist and his mouth skimmed across my neck before he muttered, “Don’t deserve you.”
The appreciative hum curling up my throat abruptly melted into a hushed laugh at the ridiculous claim. Tipping my head tothe side, I eyed him for only a moment before going back to the water bottle I’d found on my hotel room’s desk.
I wasn’t sure which one of us had brought it in there. I couldn’t remember carrying it, and Gray had been carryingmeat one point. But it was there like the sweetest offering after too many drinks I was beginning to regret, and a night of?—
My cheeks heated, and I didn’t even try to fight the smile tugging at my mouth.
Well, truthfully, the best night of my life.
“It’s just water,” I said on a murmured tease as I tipped the bottle back and took a long drink before handing it to Gray.
The bane of my absolute existence. My best friend in the world. Myhusband.
“That isn’t what I was talking about,” he mumbled before downing half the bottle and offering me the rest. When I shook my head, he finished the bottle and tossed it into the nearby trash. Taking his time, as if I wasn’t waiting for him to explain what hehadbeen talking about.
Just as I started glancing his way again to ask for clarification, he delivered a teasing bite to my jaw and added, “I like you in my clothes.”
I jammed my elbow into his stomach, even though my smile had widened at the obnoxious, caveman-like claim. “It’s just a shirt,” I said teasingly, altering my previous words as I turned in his arms, letting him lead me back toward the bed, even though we’d just left it and put onsomeclothing. “And you’re changing the subject.”
He nodded as he pulled me onto the bed and wrapped me in his arms, capturing my mouth to do exactly that.
Change the subject. Distract me with his lips and a kiss to rival every other kiss we’d shared that night. And for once, I was so perfectly content to be distracted by this man and his enticing mouth and wandering hands.
But he didn’t let us go there...again. Even though there’d been plenty ofagainsthroughout the hours after our impromptu wedding. He eventually slowed the kiss until it was nothing more than the softest, sweetest brushes of his mouth across mine before he pressed our foreheads together.
But when he reluctantly pulled away to search my face with his mint green eyes, I knew he was donechanging the subject. Still, I waited as he searched my face for long minutes, his thumb brushing along my bottom lip and cheek before he finally said, “After everything I’ve put you through, with all the?—”
“We went over this,” I hurried to say over him, not willing to get intothatafter every beautiful moment we’d shared.
“Briefly,” he corrected, his throat shifting with a forced swallow.
It was my turn to nod because ithadbeen brief. But I’d also believed every word Gray told me when he confessed to being in love with me for over a decade. I’d believed the agony and remorse in his eyes when he told me he regretted ever trying to drown out the pain of not having me with other women.
Because it’d mirrored my own agony and remorse for every lie I’d ever told him. Something I’d blurted out, to his absolute shock, after drink number three or four.
And for tonight—for now—those confessions had been enough.
“And we agreed not to get into every little thing tonight,” I reminded him. “We agreed to wait until we got home.”
Gray took a slow, deep breath before once again resting his forehead against mine. “Then what about getting into what you mean to me?”
I let my hand slide down his arm until I met where his fingers were clutching my hip. Wiggling the ring that wasslightly too big for his finger, I informed him, “I know what I mean to you.”
His head shifted against mine, as if in denial, before he passed a feather-soft kiss across my lips. “Not sure you can ever understand what you mean to me,” he muttered before pressing another kiss there and pulling away to study me as he continued. “From that first day, you’ve saved me with that cold glare. You’ve kept me from the darkest parts of my mind with that rare, reluctant smile. You gave me every reason to live, with your easy hostility and hard-to-earn laughs, and I’m grateful.”
Bemusement stole through me, silencing the butterflies in my stomach and calming the ridiculous fluttering of my pulse.
