Gray’s stare didn’t waver as he studied me for interminable seconds. “It matters because you’d be breaking up our team.”
Of course.
Of course he’s only worried about what it would do to our team.
I forced the last remnants of oxygen to leave me slowly and my body not to sag when his words felt like a blow to my already shaky confidence. When they were just another reminder of what I was and what I wasn’t to Hudson Gray.
“It’ll happen someday,” I said on a sigh to hide the disappointment there. “I doubt anyone expected us to last this long, let alone stay together forever. And now that some of the guys are getting married and starting lives, they’re probably thinking of other careers.”
That stare remained, even long after I finished talking, until Gray abruptly nodded, then made a face. “Other careers? Likewhat?”
“Something where the Dallas mafia isn’t threatening their wives and trying to traffic them,” I said pointedly.
At that, his eyebrows shot up in bemused disbelief as one of his wicked smirks stole across his face. “The Wreckers haven’t so much as glanced in our direction in more than half a year, and they’ve been lying real low. But if you thinkourmafia friends over at ARCK aren’t enough to make that peace continue, you should probably bring that up in a meeting.”
I hadn’t said that, and I didn’t think that.
We’d been getting help from the North-Carolina-based company for years on some of our more delicate cases—ourDonuts. Not that we’d known the members of ARCK were mafia until Chloe had found herself at the center of a case last year—one where she’d been targeted in the Wreckers’ trafficking ring. But we knew now. Not only that, we were now also under their protection.
Something else that had been an absolute trip to wrap our heads around, because the Wreckers had caused so much damage, fear, and grief in the Dallas-Fort Worth area for longer than we knew. They’d caused all those things forus. But a single glimpse of our ARCK friends, and the Wreckers had practically fallen all over themselves to get away from the—apparently—notorious mafia members. One word, and the Wreckers had sworn to leave us alone.
And they had.
They also hadn’t done anything that warranted our attention since.
“I didn’t say that,” I finally said, giving him an irritated scowl. “Do I think the Wreckers will stay silent forever? No.” I shrugged before pulling my legs onto the chair so they were crossed. “Eventually, they’ll start doing things again that catch our attention. Sometime after that, they’ll push the boundaries to see what they can do to us.”
Gray’s head dipped in a way that let me know he’d already had the same thoughts. “And then our friends will make another trip from North Carolina to remind the Wreckers why that’s a bad idea.”
“That doesn’t mean Briggs and Thatch are going to want to keep putting their wives and families at risk,” I challenged. “It’s impractical to believe the six of us will still be together in five years.”
Gray seemed to search my expression before informing me, “I can assure you, they have no intention of doing anything else.Ever. You, on the other hand...” A muscle ticked in his jaw before he glanced away. “Good to know where you stand.”
My mouth parted to defend myself, but I shut it before I could say something like,This is all I can see myself doing.Or,I’m afraid to lose any of you.
“Do you ever wonderwhy?” he asked suddenly, and my brows furrowed as I watched him continue to study my rug, his leg bouncing a mile a minute. With a strained exhale, he glanced my way and clarified, “Why we eloped?”
I stilled at the question, my heart doing that terrible thing again as the picture on my phone flashed through my mind. I’d stared at it so many times and for so long, I could conjure it perfectly.
My unrestrained smile and unguarded eyes. The way Gray’s dimple had shown that he’d been smiling as he’d kissed the corner of my mouth. The fact that we’d simply appeared deliriously happy, when I would’ve expected us to look fall-over-drunk, completely oblivious to what was happening.
My chest ached at the thought because it was everything I’d wanted since the day I’d met Hudson Gray, and it’d only happened after mind-numbing amounts of alcohol.
But did I ever wonder why?
No. However, I had asked myselfHow could I let this happen?so much that the question had sort of lost its meaning.
“Do you?” I challenged without answering.
A sliver of disappointment worked through his expression before his attention fell to the rug again.
Seconds passed before his head started bobbing. The slow, seemingly weighted movement made my stomach knot, even before he began speaking. “Every day, I wonder why you agreed.”
Shock pulsed through me and my head snapped back at the sure way he phrased the words, as if heknewhe’d been the one to suggest we elope.
But before I could gather my thoughts into a coherent sentence, Gray had pushed off the couch and turned for the front door.
“Wait, what—what?” I snapped as I scrambled to follow him. “So, youdiddo this?You’rethe reason we eloped? When were you going to tell me, and what else do you remember?”
