“It’s going to be a long night for them.” She’s married to James and I want to ask her how she lives with the tension and fear that the reality of her husband’s job is dangerous, but it’s late and I’m afraid to hear her answer.
Mindy, Peony, and a few others, including my grandmother, help clean up. She asks, “Did you guys talk?”
“We started to, but there is still more to say.”
The girls, Thomas, and I spend the next couple of hours eliminating evidence of the Fireman’s Ball. We also eat our share of Crush Cakes.
Sometime after nine, my phone buzzes.
Patton: Don’t wait for me. It could be hours. Get some rest.
Me: Be safe.
Patton: Always. We’ll talk tomorrow.
Uncertainty plays a violent round of bumper cars in my mind.
Grandma Joyce pats my arm. “He’s fine. That man knows what he’s doing.”
“I just—” I pause. “I care about him. A lot.”
“We know, sweetheart. Come on. Let’s get you home.”
As we’re gathering our things, I spot Pauline, who’s married to a man who survived smoke jumping and now works in admin. She catches my eye and gives me a small nod.
They’ve got this. They’re professionals. They’ll be fine.
But as I step back outside into the cool night air, I can’t shake the feeling that something has shifted. Not just between Patton and me—though that definitely has. But somethingbigger. Something that feels like standing on the edge of a cliff, not sure if I’m about to fly or fall … or if it isn’t a cliff after all.
In the distance, the horizon glows faintly orange. But it’s not the sunrise. It’s the fire at Alpine Ridge … and Patton is there, risking his life.
At home, sleep eludes me. Every time I close my eyes, I see his face when we stood on the steps. The vulnerability. The fear. The hope.
My phone sits on the nightstand, volume up, just in case.
Around two a.m. it buzzes.
Patton: Are you awake?
Me: Can’t sleep. You?
Patton: Taking a break. The fire is mostly contained.
Me: Everyone okay?
Patton: Crew has a couple of minor injuries. Nothing serious. No one was at the location, thank goodness.
Me: That’s good.
Patton: I keep thinking about tonight.
Me: Me too.
Patton: About what you said on the steps.
My heart, already trotting, takes off at a gallop.
Me: Which part?
