“It’s different for every element to some degree,” he began slowly, taking my hands in his. “Usually what happens is that you feel a tingling inside you, and the sensation is typically tied to whatever the element is. As you feel the magic start to bubble up, you have this urge to seek out your element. For myself, I could feel the call of a nearby river as the magic coursed like rushing waters through my veins. Once you’ve found it, something snaps inside you, and the element jumps to your hand, ready to be wielded. After that it takes training to master it like anything else, but anytime you see your element, you can call it to you and manipulate it as an extension of your being. You, on the other hand…”
He pulled me into him so my back was to his chest, and he wrapped his arms around me. I wished I could stop feeling bad long enough to enjoy the gentle touch of him nestling his chin on top of my head.
“The sconce behind you didn’t so much as flicker. Do you understand what I’m saying?” His arms tightened around me just enough that I wondered if he was afraid for me.
Or afraidofme.
“I don’t know what any of this means,” I admitted.
“It means, Rain, that you didn’t pull the fire to you like every igniservian has done throughout history.”
I took in a sharp inhale.
“It means, Fea Remia, that youcreatedthe fire.”
Sin left me alone in the room to go find Peywyn, saying she would have some clothes I could borrow and wouldn’t ask any questions. I tried to ignore the spark of jealousy that they were apparently close enough she would just hand over her clothing.
I should have told Sin not to leave me alone. That leaving me with nothing but my thoughts, especially after dropping a bomb like that, would not end well. I didn’t even know how to process the fact that I created fire. All of this magic was such a foreign concept to me that I honestly couldn’t see a difference between creation and manipulation. A week ago I would have laughed and said it was all absurd. It was like someone told me unicorns existed, then I stumbled upon one that could also fly. Like, sure, why not? If we’re hopping on a crazy train might as well ride to the end of the line.
I dropped to the floor and slumped back against the sofa, not caring that I was probably getting bits of charred fabric in my hair. I needed a shower anyway.
Banging my head against the sofa frame, I tried to think of anything other than Sin. Per usual, I failed miserably because my brain kept circling back around to what a tragic idea it was for us to be together. Not to mention, I still didn’t know how I felt about him watching over me for ten years. On one hand, it was kind of sweet, his need to protect me from whatever dangers he thought Rivella posed. On the other hand… it kind of left me with stalker vibes.
I would be more than happy to let a guy as hot as Sin follow me around nowadays, but when I was fifteen? Little weird. And I knew it wasn’t like that for him at first. He’d been pretty clear it was more 'protect the innocent' until well after I was an adult,but still… If he thought I was in so much danger, why not talk to me?
And why was he still not talking to me?
“Do you know what I have done to keep you away from this place? What I have sacrificed?”
If there was truly a threat to my life in Rivella, then why not warn me?
It was the first thing I brought up the moment Sin returned.
“You’re keeping things from me,” I blurted out when he walked through the door carrying a pair of leather fighting pants and a long-sleeve beige tunic.
My question must have caught him off guard because he stilled just past the threshold. “Yes, I am,” he confirmed, his tone lacking any emotional reaction to my accusation. He handed me the clothing, then turned his back so I could change. I snorted at his modesty given where his mouth had been less than twenty minutes ago.
I tapped him on the shoulder once I was dressed. “Now spill. If you were so afraid for me to come here, why not warn me back then? And why are you still not telling me what’s going on? I’m not doing this with you anymore, Sin. If you really care about me, you’ll tell me the truth.”
He moved away from me to lean against the closed door. The space between us felt awkward, uncomfortable, and I hoped our—Relationship? Friendship?—hadn’t just taken a step backward.
“It’s not that simple, Rain.”
“So make it simple, Sin.”
He ran a hand through his dark hair, and I hated how much I wanted it to be my hands running through those soft waves.
“I can tell you that I never approached you in your world simply because I had no idea what to even say. How would you have responded if I showed up one day claiming that you were the lost princess of another world when I had no proof to backit up? I didn’t have my magic in the Other Realm, Rain. And I couldn’t show you the rift because the Walker would have seen you and told Verren. Oh, and exactly what would have happened if by some miracle you did believe me? You spend every waking moment afraid that any stranger you see might be someone who has come to kidnap you?” He shook his head. “There was no good option, Rain. The only way I saw to keep you safe was lying.”
“And now? Why keep me in the dark now?”
“I want to tell you, Rain. I do.”
“So tell me,” I begged.
“I… I want to,” he gritted out, his fists clenching and unclenching.
I wanted to grab his arms and shake the answers out of him. “So do!” I shouted, moving closer to him.
