Taya playfully slapped her leg. “Don’t worry about what anyone thinks. That’s the beauty of being in your forties—you don’t care anymore about what people say. It’s your life—you live it how you want to, and I know you’re going to love being a mum. I didn’t get to appreciate it the way I would now. I was so stressed and anxious all the time, worrying about silly things like having a messy house or whether Camden was excelling at ballet. Things that didn’t matter. When I lost Todd, my entire world came crashing down, but I still had to be a parent to Camden. I was on autopilot a lot. I sometimes wish I could go back in time and relish those moments with her — the cuddles in bed way before the sun rose, the sticky kisses, the messy playroom. So much of her childhood was me hurrying to clean up after her or to cook a meal before rushing off to the inn with her on my hip.”
“You were a great mum, and you did the best you could,” Penny said encouragingly.
“Yes, I was a good mum. And you will be too. But I was so stressed about so many things back then. Of course, I lost my husband and had a business to run. But I think I’d have a different outlook if I was starting out now. Don’t worry about your age—think about how much more relaxed and at ease you’re going to be with everything. You’ve already built your career, you know who you are, and you’re capable and strong. You can absorb and cherish every single moment with your child.”
“Thanks, Taya. I appreciate that. It’s so easy to feel overwhelmed sometimes.”
“You are going to be fine. More than fine. You’ll be great.”
They sat in silence for a few minutes. Taya considered standing, but after a full day at work and then running around for three hours serving people and managing games at the party, she was completely exhausted. She let her eyes drift shut and almost fell asleep right there on Penny’s porch. She startled and rose to her feet. “I should go before I pass out.”
“Before you go, there was something I wanted to talk to you about.”
Taya sat again, turned to face Penny, and blinked to keep herself awake. “I’m listening.”
Penny sighed. “You know how Bea told us about Betsy being the murderer? I’ve been thinking about it a lot.”
“That must’ve been a shock to you. I know you like Betsy.”
Penny huffed. “More than a shock. I don’t know what to say or do, how to process it. All my life, I’ve known Betsy Norton as the nice old lady at the flower shop. Now I find out she killed my grandmother? And the man I thought killed her is my father, and he’s innocent. So, what does that mean? My mind is a complete jumble. I try to talk to Rowan about it, but he goes blank. I don’t think he knows what to say. I’m not sure he even believes what Bea told us.”
“That’s understandable, I suppose. There’s been so much speculation. And his entire life, he’s seen Buck as the man responsible. The villain in his life’s story.”
“It’s impacting him a lot more than he lets on,” Penny whispered, glancing over her shoulder at the house to make sure Rowan wasn’t nearby.
“I’m sorry, sweetie. I know that’s hard on you.”
“It is, but I’m also confused. Does this mean Buck isn’t the bad guy? And if he’s not the bad guy, should I give him a chance as my father and as a grandfather to our baby? I’m not sure I’m comfortable with that. After all, he did take advantage of my mother when she was a teen.”
Taya pressed her lips together. It wasn’t her place to tell Penny what to do, but she couldn’t imagine trusting Buck, even if he was innocent of murder. Sometimes it was hard to let go of the past.
“You can tell me. I won’t hold it against you,” Penny said as if reading her thoughts.
“I don’t trust him. I know he’s apparently innocent, but I’ve thought he was a criminal for too long. Plus, that whole thing with your mother — it’s disturbing.”
“I know, but he’s my dad.”
“Maybe you can have a relationship with him, but let it form gradually and see how it goes.”
“Maybe.” Penny looked pensive. She stared out over the ocean, then grimaced. “I’ve got to go inside. My legs are getting stiff, and my back aches. I’m tired all the time.”
“That’s hard, I know. But as soon as the baby is out, you’ll feel a lot better.”
“Only six weeks to go!” Penny said, lumbering to her feet with Taya’s arm for support.
“We should go shopping for baby things on the mainland.”
“That would be fun, but I’ve been given an avalanche of gifts at this wonderful party. I’ll go through everything and see if I still need a few items we can shop for.”
Taya pouted. “I love shopping for babies. Let me spoil this little cutie pie. I don’t care if you already have plenty.”
“Fine, you can spoil him or her.” She laughed. “You’re going to be a wonderful auntie, Taya Eldridge.”
“Auntie Taya. I like the sound of that.”
Taya swatted at a mosquito on her leg, then they walked inside.
“I’ve been meaning to ask — would you be the baby’s godmother?” Penny asked. She stopped and took Taya’s hand, squeezing it gently. “It would mean the world to me.”
