She snatches the candy box from me and slams it shut. “Don’t you think dressing likethatis enough?”
“I wanted to wear my nicest dress,” I say, pretending like we didn’t already have a five-hour long argument about my outfit this morning.
When one turns eighteen, some say that marks a girl turning into a woman. When Achi turned eighteen, she switched from human to robot. Five years later, she still only cares about following Ma’s rules, being on our “best behavior,” and showing society that the Ilagan women are doing A-OK. Of course, she can’t resist lecturing me about my “impulsive tendencies.”
“Nika, when you put on that dress this morning, did you stop and think about the consequences of your actions?”
Of course I did. The consequences were my main motivation for executing said action. Contrary to her opinion, I’m fine with other people thinking,Nika’s being the bitchy sister again. At least I’m the bitchy sister who looks good.
Mourning purposes aside, it’s also very satisfying that black is my color. In her bright red dress with gold circles all over it, Achi looks like a walking red envelope.
Achi skims Ma’s notebook of superstitions one more time. Ever since she took over ting hun planning, Ma’s “book of superstitions” became her bible. “When you serve juice to Uncle Derrick’s relatives, remember you’re supposed to say,Tshia dimmmmmm.” Achi enunciates the words as if she hasn’t been telling me how to say “Please drink” in Hokkien every single waking moment of the past month.
“How come you never teach me how to say bad words in Hokkien?”
Achi grumbles and tells me to let her handle the talking. She goes back to studying Ma’s notebook again and blocks my view when I try peeking. “The notebook is reserved for the planning committee.”
“There are four people planning this ting hun, so we’reallon the planning committee.” I try grabbing Ma’s notebook and she dangles it above her head so I can’t reach. Ugh. Ihateit when she uses my height against me.
When Dr. Derrick mentioned that his family wanted to hire a ting hun coordinator to plan the engagement ceremony, my type A sister couldn’t resist volunteering for the job. For the record, no one asked her—and no one asked me if I was okay with getting grouped into “committees” with my aunties.
Auntie Grace and Auntie Baby have been friends with Masince high school, and they grew even closer when they all had babies at the same time. They joke that they were always fated to find one another since all their names started with Marie: Marie Beth, Marie Grace, and Marie Francesca (side note: People call Auntie Baby “Baby” because she’s the youngest in her family, not because it’s short for Francesca). Together, they call their friend group the Marie-tres.
They’re not only Ma’s best friends, they’re Ma’s number one enablers. The reason why it took forever to schedule this ting hun is because Auntie Baby kept finding new ways why every single date of the year was bad luck. When Ma told her Marie-tres that she wanted to get engaged on a “lucky” date, Auntie Baby went on and consulted all the feng shui experts around the country. The only date that Auntie Baby’s several sources agreed on was August 8, 2088 (I was fine with putting off this whole wedding idea for another few decades, but of course, my sister had to butt in and ruin the fun).
I love my aunties. Ma doesn’t have any sisters, so Auntie Baby and Auntie Grace have always filled that void. Auntie Grace’s daughter, Kayla, even became my best friend.
It’s Auntie Baby’s son who I could use less of.
My theory is that his ego was built in from the genesis of his actual name, Moseph. Like, naming him after one biblical name wasn’t enough. Apparently, his parents couldn’t decide between Moses and Joseph, so they decided to squish them together—hence giving him double the biblical superiority complex.
“Auntie Baby mentioned that Seph needed help setting up. Told her that you would be the point person.”
Achi waves at Auntie Baby, who’s standing by the kitchen, and gestures that I’m coming over. To my misfortune, Seph is right next to her and waves right back.
“Oh, I really don’t like you right now.”
“Go on,” Achi says, pushing me forward.
I grumble, “Can’t believe this is how you treat your only sister.”
As I make my way past the couch toward the dining area, I can feel the stares and even gawking from Derrick’s family. When they become harder to ignore, I hold on to the hair tie on my wrist, straighten my posture, and walk with even more confidence in my dress.
“Annika!” Auntie Baby lights up when she sees me. There’s a slight crack in her cheeriness when she eyes me from head to toe. “What a… dress.”
“Thanks, Auntie,” I deadpan, ending the window for small talk. “Achi said you needed help?”
“Oh, yes. Jackie put me in charge of the entertainment committee!”
I hold my tongue from pointing out that she’s the lone member of said committee.
She turns to Seph. “Can you show Seph where to set up? Your mom agreed that it’d be wonderful if he can play some background music when she enters the room.”
Not even the occasion of my mom’s engagement can stop the star of Moseph King from shining.
“What if the two of you do a duet? That would be such a great shot for the ting hun video!” She beams at me and adds, “You know, Nika, they also give awards to couples at prom too.”
It’s not enough that I have to put up with this guy’s presence—I also have to tolerate Auntie Baby’s not-so-subtle hints about going to prom with him. As president of the Saint Agnes Alumni Association, Auntie Baby is also very active in the parents’ prom committee. She’s made it her mission to secure my attendance, and to hint that I should bring her son along with me.
