“Do it, do it,” I chant. “Do it for the plot!”
She grimaces. “Fine.” She juts out her chin, lowers her voice and mimics an old-school Italian gangster. “Just when you think you’re out, they pull you back in.”
“Yes!” Honey screams.
“More elderberry wine?” I hold up the bottle we found in the dusty cellars.
“More wine!”
I fill their mugs. A little slops on the ancient rug, but it’s okay. The rug is red and brown and hides a multitude of sins. Any stain becomes part of the pattern. “I’ve been thinking,” I say. “Do you want to form an alliance?”
“What?”
“We should join forces, have each other’s backs.”
“You’re so pretty,” Raine murmurs to the bear head.
“I’m in,” Honey says. “We need to stick together.”
“Fine.”
“Excellent. What shall we call ourselves?”
“The Villains,” I say.
“The Villainesses,” Honey corrects. “Raine, what do you think?”
It takes a moment to explain things to Raine, but once she gets it, she holds up a finger. “I know. I know. How about The Villaini? Gender neutral term.”
“That is actually brilliant.” I raise a toast to her.
“I don’t know, guys,” Honey says. She’s added glitter to her mermaid look, and now it’s everywhere. “I don’t think I’m cut out to be a villainess.” She turns to Raine. “You’re smart.” She points to me. “You’re named after a poison.”
“And she’s obviously psychotic,” Raine puts in.
“Thank you.” I give a little bow.
“What can I do? I’m only good with hair and makeup.”
“That’s not true—” Raine starts to protest.
First rule of friendship: support your friend.
I lean in and get Honey’s attention. “Did you know there are bees that feed exclusively on the pollen of a type of rhododendron? The honey they make is poisonous.”
“I read about this,” Raine says. “There was a thing with the Roman soldiers…”
“They ate the honey and it incapacitated the army,” I fill it. “For weeks.”
“Yes! Murder honey!” Raine pumps her fist into the air.
“Murder honey! Yeah!” I cheer with her.
“So?” Honey says.
“So, Supervillain Rule #1: Your best offense is a good disguise. You’re sweet and gentle, Honey. No one would suspect you of anything. Just saying.”
She ponders this.
