There’s nothing left of the fire but a few glowing embers. The sweat’s cooling on my skin but I don’t want to move. “Is it true? You’ve never had a girl up here?”
“Only you.” He kisses my temple.
“I like that.”
“Possessive, are you?”
“You have no idea. I’ve had a crush on you since high school.” The darkness makes it easy to spill my secrets.
“You were too good for me in high school. Still are.” He draws away and prowls naked into the kitchen. I squint but can’t see what he’s doing until he returns and presses something warm and wet to my sore pussy.
He cleans me up, wiping away the traces of himself. But part of him is deep inside me. When he’s done, he tosses the washcloth on the floor, but doesn’t return to my side.
I’m shivering. “Come back to me.”
He fixes the quilt so it’s covering me, and stretches out beside me. Other than a few pops and crackles from the dying fire, it’s so quiet, I imagine I can hear the falling snow. Joel’s breathingis deep and soft, but his body is tense beside me. What is he thinking?
“Joel?”
“I’m here, babygirl.” But he sounds distant.
“Did… did I do okay?”
He rolls to me, gathering me in his arms. “You did perfect. You are perfect.”
I settle back against him. This is what I’ve wanted for so long—to be in Joel’s arms.
“I have a confession of my own to make,” he says. “I don't need to buy groceries half as much as I do.”
I knew it!I smile into the darkness. “I was wondering what you were doing with all that ground chuck.”
“Sometimes I'll just drop it off at the soup kitchen. Whenever my day’s too long and grinding me down, I drive past Gemma’s store. And if I drive past, I have to go in. Because nothing in my life goes so wrong that it can’t be fixed by seeing you.”
I hum and snuggle closer. “After prison, why did you come back to town?”
“Because I was done searching for what I already had. You make your life and your happiness.”
Exactly.I trail my fingers over his skin. I can’t see them in the dark, but I know he has some freckles here and there. I’ve studied him for so long but I barely know him. It'll take me a lifetime to educate myself about this man.
“I wish…” His voice cracks.
“What?”
“I wish I could spend every night like this.”
“But we can.”
“No. I'm not in your plans, babygirl.” His fingers stroke my belly. “You're going to finish school and move on to bigger and better things.”
“Working at a library isn't necessarily bigger and better.”
“You're too smart for this town, too smart for me.”
“You're plenty smart.”
“Lainey, please.” He catches my hand, stilling it. “I have to let you go.”
“Do you want to let me go?”
