Pain and loneliness were a bad combination. I drove for as long as I could. Wanted to die when I couldn’t go on.
I found a lay-by and parked up, closing my eyes, just for a moment.
It was still dark, or maybe it was dark again when I was next aware enough to notice.
I woke Alexei and tipped some electrolytes down him.
He got out of the van to do whatever.
I leaned against the side. It was raining again. It felt like I’d been wet forever. Wet and cold. Hypothermia danced through my mind, but I let it go. I didn’t need something else to worry about.
“Where are we?”
I blinked.
Alexei was in front of me, rubbing his eyes.
I searched my brain for the answer. “Birmingham. Near the M5.”
“We have three hours to go?”
“Our bikes are in Bristol.”
“Our phones too, but I do not care. Do you?”
“No.”
“I can drive, Veles.”
“No.”
“That is all you have to say? No?”
There were pros and cons to Alexei feeling well enough to fight me. But it didn’t matter. Knowing how sick he’d been, I couldn’t let him drive.
I opened the passenger door and pointed at the seat. “Get in.”
“There is one electrolyte bottle left. Drink it and I will do as you say.”
We struck a deal and hit the road again. The electrolytes carried me back to the sea, and by then we found ourselves in another race against time.
Alexei doused the van with the fuel we’d left on the remote farmland for this exact purpose. Sheltered by hills, the blaze would only be seen from the ocean.
He tossed the empty can into the back and retreated. “Light the fire, my friend.”
I did, and for a sluggish moment, the heat of the flames was everything I wanted. But it wasn’t real. It wasn’t Decoy, andfuckmy life, I still had a ten-mile hike before we found each other again.
A ten-milerunif we didn’t want to be seen.
My legs officially hated me. Pretty sure Alexei did too—torching the van had been my idea, way back when.
Chasing the sun, we ran, through fields and over fences, skirting around campsites and farmland. I stumbled through rows of raspberry canes, and they made me think of Ivy.
Then I fell in the dirt.
You don’t deserve her.
You don’t deserve him.
